If Bond Villains Grew Weed...
So you're the kind of guy who wants a sprawling, secure underground lair. But you still enjoy the simple things in life, like fine marijuana and quiet time with the neighbors. So how about this secret underground cavern, built right under a quiet town in Tennessee?
Some enterprising drug dealers apparently got tired of having to drive to some secret location to tend to their plants, so they built a massive underground complex large enough to house a full pot farm. And the neighbors, who apparently didn't want to pry, never noticed.
If you look closely there is also a little chain lock at the top.
The weed lair was built right underneath a normal-looking house with a hydraulic door in the garage that led to a concrete ramp 50-yards long. Inside the lair there was enough room for about 1,000 marijuana plants and the whole thing was climate controlled so the weed could grow in comfort.
There were even living quarters--or a prison, depending on how you look at it--inside the cave to "house" the migrant workers they would bring in to tend to the plants. If you are like us you probably wonder about the logic of hiring temp workers to staff your drug empire in your super secret cave; but we've never made $6-8 million dollars a year doing anything so what the fuck do we know?
The cave even had an escape tunnel that led up to an exit covered by a fake hydraulic rock which we find both awesome and supremely ridiculous at the same time.
While we like the idea of an escape hatch we question how much villain street cred you can really retain after crawling out from underneath a fake rock Hogan's Heroes style.
Cops eventually busted the pot growers and the cave was sold to a "cheese maker." The sale included the land, the remains of the house, the cave and, amazingly enough, most of the pot growing equipment. We expect that there is going to be some truly bitching "cheese" coming out of Tennessee real soon.
Sweden's High Tech Data Fortress
Sweden, apparently a haven for both supervillains and delicious meatballs, is home to this supposed "ISP Data Center" that is built in an old nuclear bunker with 16-inch-thick doors, and refurbished with a total supervillain makeover, complete with triple redundancy cables and fiber optic network and a soothing greenhouse and waterfalls.
Worried that your power is going to be cut right in the middle of executing your world takeover? You can rest easy because the site also comes with two German submarine engines that provide back up power.
Our history isn't great but we're pretty sure this isn't the first time German submarine engines were used to try and take over the world.
The designers also installed the warning alarms from the submarines, but claim that was "just for fun" and not at all to give them enough time to launch a counterattack.