In a recent interview with NME Magazine, Keith Richards-the seemingly immortal 63 year-old guitarist for the Rolling Stones who used to use uncut heroin in the same way that most people use salt-said that the craziest thing he'd ever snorted in forty years of the drug-fueled rock star lifestyle was a line of his own father's cremated ashes mixed with cocaine.
Clearly, this man is an inspiration to us all.
His manager later claimed that it was all a joke, but the fact that nobody was really that surprised at the whole thing says an awful lot about Keith Richards. Even more, though, it just begs the question as to what the second craziest thing he's managed to suck up his nose in the pursuit of satisfaction might be, and, well, we're not ones to let something like that go unanswered, so after an exhaustive bit of research, we've come up with some possibilities:
You don't make astonishing amounts of money without ending up a jerk in some way.
Even our most popular forms of entertainment can treat their employees like absolute trash.
The news spent weeks reporting on these giant scandals without bothering to mention the stupidest parts.
Well, this is ... bleakly hilarious.