15 of the Coolest, But Most Disrespectful Uses of Priceless Artifacts
![15 of the Coolest, But Most Disrespectful Uses of Priceless Artifacts](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/7/4/877974_320x180.jpg)
Here’s a fun fact for you to continue accepting we’re but a speck of dust floating in meaningless nothingness: Titanic exhibitions all over the world boast actual Titanic artifacts, of course, but also props from Cameron’s movie. But that’s… weird. We get that the movie is cool and all, but the way its legacy has become intertwined with an actual tragedy is the sort of reality-twisting mindscrew that makes smarty pants have to invent new concepts. It is cool, yes, but also, like, disrespectful? Hey, welcome to today’s Pictofact. We missed you.
We’re now examining 15 of the coolest but most disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts, relics, antiques, artistic masterpieces, and just old-timey bones. They’re not flat out cool uses. Those would just be museums where museum nerds can take care of them and us normies can learn from them (hopefully in their native countries, you British imperialists). And they’re not only disrespectful uses. That would just be destroying them, a favorite subject for us here at Cracked. Instead, we’re focusing on that sweet spot, where an absolute lack of historical respect meets flexible definitions of coolness. For example, is the rapping dog from the Italian Titanic cartoon cool? Of course it is. And did we start this intro with the Titanic just to end it with that clip? We missed you so much.
19th-Century Guitar
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Kurt Russell smashed a unique guitar on camera. The Martin Guitar Museum thought they could trust Quentin Tarantino with a priceless guitar from the 1870s for The Hateful Eight. But then a series of wacky misunderstandings ensued, and Russell ended up destroying it on camera. Jennifer Jason Leigh's reaction in the scene? That's real. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/7/8/877978.jpg)
The Weinstein Company
The Mona Lisa
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Coolest bathroom decoration ever After Leonardo's death, the Mona Lisa was acquired by his benefactor, King Francis I. The French king hung it in his bathroom at the Fontainebleau palace, where it stayed for a bit until the French court was moved to Versailles. Of course, bathrooms were way different, bigger, and classier if you were a French royal. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/0/877980.jpg)
The Mona Lisa, by Leonardo da Vinci
Great Wall of China
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Skateboarding over the Great Wall of China The Great Wall is really old, so it has been really really neglected. But cool disrespect got truly post-modern in 2005, when Danny Way became the first person to jump it on a skateboard. Did China condemn such Western decadence? Nope, they televised it, and the Ministry of Culture gave him an actual chunk of the wall. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/8/877988.jpg)
Ancient Weed
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Smoking weed older than Jesus At the peak of the cool and disrespectful crossroad is the following conundrum: You get your hands on some 2,700-years-old Chinese kush. What do you do? Do you preserve it under high-tech conditions in a museum or lab, or do you blast some early Black Sabbath and just chill on the couch? Yes,the song would be Fairies Wear Boots. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/9/1/877991.jpg)
Troy
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Blowing up Troy Bombs are cool, the remains of the ancient city of f Troy must also be cool, but they are not cool when put together. 19th-century grifter archaeologist Heinrich Schliemann found nine ancient cities in 1873, all layered on top of each other. Не then blew them up one by one to get to Troy-but blew up the actual city. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/2/877982.jpg)
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Dead Musicians' Teeth
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Stealing dead musicians' teeth In 2012, weirdo Ondrej Jajcaj Jr. bragged on YouTube about desecrating graves for the teeth of decomposing bodies in Vienna's ancient cemeteries. In particular, he had stolen composers Johannes Brahms and Johann Strauss ll's, erm, teeth. The cool part here is that Brahms and Strauss rock, while the disrespectful and lame part is Jajcaj's attempt at edginess. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/4/877984.jpg)
Stonehenge
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Partying at Stonehenge Surely Stonehenge has always been treated with solemo respect, right? Ifrespect means late-night drug-fueled orgies, then yes. Alright, we might be exaggerating, but the site only went to the British government in the 20th century. When you have centuries of crowds bringing music and food, you know there were also drugs and orgies. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/6/877986.jpg)
William Shakespeare's House
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Hate for tourists beats love for Shakespeare Reverend Francis Gastrell purchased Shakespeare's final home in 1753, but there was one problem: friggin' tourists. So he went and cut down the large mulberry tree Shakespeare himself planted and loved. Then he escaped the angry townsfolk, but as he was still forced to pay taxes, he went full Joker and burned the place to the CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/5/877985.jpg)
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Sone Age Puppy
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts 29 30 29 M U 30 R قل Trying to clone a Stone Age puppy Out of the Russian permafrost sounds like the premise for a horror movie, but they actually found a cute Stone Age puppy. South Korean scientists want to clone the 12,400-year- old good little boy, along with wooly mammoths and cave lions. Yeah, science is cool, but this is also disrespectful because these people learned nothing from Jurassic Park. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/9/877989.jpg)
Pompeii Man
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Memes out of poor Pompeii man Today, Pompeii is solemnly remembered as a symbol of man's hubris over natu-just kidding, it's all about dank memes. One particular Pompeiian man briefly became a memetic icon for the giant boulder right on his head. Archaeologists are still debating whether the Road Runner mocked him and ran off leaving a dust trail. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/3/877983.jpg)
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Mummy's Hand
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Using a mummy's hand as a sci-fi prop In 2013, customs officials at the Los Angeles International Airport found a very realistic prop in a batch of old sci-fi props coming from France. It turned out to be the hand of a 3,000-year-old mummy. The smugglers were arrested, and the hand was returned to Egypt (sadly, with no involvement of Brendan Fraser). CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/1/877981.jpg)
The Louvre Museum
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts DAVID Jessen Smit CANING The other, secret Louvres The Louvre being such a respected, classy, high-end museum, even its leftovers stash must be cool, right? In fact, the stuff they don't consider worthy of showing is in underground storage all over Paris. It looks like the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark, but with masterpieces. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/9/0/877990.jpg)
Jeremy Bentham's Head
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Playing soccer with Jeremy Bentham's head The Enlightenment philosopher came up with Utilitarianism, the panopticon, and having his taxidermied corpse on display at a local university. Eventually, though, his head looked too Freddy Krueger-ish to display, so it was substituted with a wax replica. The original head became a prop, getting stolen by a rival college and kicked around in matches. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/7/9/877979.jpg)
Babylon
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts The ancient city of Babylon (brought to you by Saddam Hussein). Hussein restricted access to Babylon for 30 years to rebuild it in his own image. Now, Hussein was not cool. What is (ironically) cool is destroying a 4,000-year-old city by cheaply building everything back with messages saying how awesome and non-narcissistic you are. Kanye and Elon wish they had this level of unearned entitlement. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/7/7/877977.jpg)
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Ecce Homo
![Disrespectful uses of priceless artifacts Monkey Jesus Around 1930, Spanish artist Elías García Martínez painted the unremarkable Jesus portrait Ecce Homo. In 2012, untrained amateur artist Cecilia Giménez just said to herself, Sure, I can restore it, how hard can it be? Such childlike obliviousness gave US the artistic monstrosity our godforsaken age deserves. CRACKED.COM](https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/imageset/9/8/7/877987.jpg)
Elías García Martínez, Cecilia Giménez
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