Our gadgets are already affecting the way our bodies work. For instance, the cellphone came along and made the part of your brain that stores phone numbers, directions and the details of nude scenes totally obsolete. We asked you to show us what it might look like when that process starts in on the rest of our body.
For an entire generation of college graduates facing a job market with nothing but tens of thousands of dollars in student loan debt and frat party beer guts under their belts, the future is looking grim. Very, very grim.
Lately, many of these kind-of-hypothetical emails have asked about the effectiveness of toning shoes, like the Sketcher Shape-Ups. These products claim to enhance the tone and musculature of the wearer's ass and legs, and many of our readers, desiring ass and leg-play, wish to enhance their own features to better secure it.
Like elves in Santa's workshop, bootleg toy makers around the world are busy cranking action figures and games for all of the world's children. Only these will be sold by street vendors and dollar stores, at a fraction of the price of official toys.
So, one day, you decide to amuse yourself by cursing into a microphone for two minutes and uploading it to YouTube. A year later, you're on the phone with a reporter talking about how you offended an entire nation, and will possibly be charged for inciting violence.
If these products didn't exist, movies wouldn't make sense.
The last decade has not been kind to us. If you are reading this, or more likely, forcing someone to read it to you, then you already know the sorry state in which we find ourselves. Classrooms, offices and sports teams across the country have conspired against us to tear down the delicate social hierarchy we so carefully built with one gut-punch
Wouldn't you love to know who shot JFK or whether he secretly had sex with your mom and is actually your real dad, or what the Supreme Court is for?