Cracked Archive - Tech

These maniac queries seem less like valid suggestions and more like something a coked-up 'True Detective' character might scream at the unforgiving skies.

• By Pauli Poisuo
• /
• June 04, 2016

There will be a VR version of everything. Everything. Including things that have no business being in virtual reality.

• By Luis Prada
• /
• June 03, 2016

You can thank the VR engineers who diverted their attention away from the virtual tits bouncing against their corneas long enough to innovate the following areas.

• By Luis Prada
• /
• May 24, 2016

ASMR videos baffle science, but millions of views on the internet suggests there's something to this strange phenomenon.

• By Stephanie Georgopulos
• /
• May 16, 2016

You could be standing underneath the Hollywood sign, and Google would still direct you on a two-hour death march to a distant observatory.

• By Adam Wears
• /
• May 15, 2016

When a superstar tragically dies in car crash, logically you should leverage that to sell car insurance.

• By E. Reid Ross
• /
• April 19, 2016

It turns out modern conveniences make being openly racist super easy.

• By Adam Wears
• /
• April 06, 2016

You are a coward, and that is why GoPro needs to embrace pornography.

• By Luis Prada
• /
• March 29, 2016

If a dating app is encouraging you to meet strangers, then it should also help get away from them.

• By Luke McKinney
• /
• February 14, 2016

This universal acceptance of Windows 10 is especially bizarre since it seems like people are forgetting all the shady stuff Microsoft has already pulled in their short history of updates.

• By Erik Germ
• /
• February 11, 2016

Bluetooth and speakerphones don't do anything to help their user's distractedness, and in fact more car accidents are attributed to hands-free technology.

• By Ivan Farkas, Niko G, Vicki Veritas
• /
• January 31, 2016

Given the cornucopia of newfangled doodads we're immersed in daily, we tend be less aware of when our gadgets start sucking a wee bit more.

• By E. Reid Ross
• /
• January 24, 2016

One night I got wasted and decided I'd finally had enough Minion memes. So I decided to fire back at them in the most gangster way I knew how: I drafted a tweet about it.

• By Erik Germ
• /
• January 13, 2016

Our near-future will be filled with annoyances that will make us yearn for an ape and/or machine uprising.

• By Michael Hossey
• /
• December 22, 2015

It turns out that a stubborn determination to fix something RIGHT NOW DAMMIT is not an especially good mindset when dealing with delicate, precision-oriented tasks.</p>

• By Chris Bucholz
• /
• December 19, 2015