Cracked Archive - Tech


The 12 Most Catastrophic Ways Anyone Ever Failed On The Job

The Atlas Centaur 5 exploded seconds after lift off. The launch pad couldn't be used for a whole year.


5 Common-Sense Dating Apps That Unbelievably Don't Exist

If a dating app is encouraging you to meet strangers, then it should also help get away from them.


4 Awful Secrets No One Is Telling You About Windows 10

This universal acceptance of Windows 10 is especially bizarre since it seems like people are forgetting all the shady stuff Microsoft has already pulled in their short history of updates.


5 Ways Modern Technology Is Ruining Your Life

Bluetooth and speakerphones don't do anything to help their user's distractedness, and in fact more car accidents are attributed to hands-free technology.


6 Futuristic Technologies That Are Huge Disappointments

Given the cornucopia of newfangled doodads we're immersed in daily, we tend be less aware of when our gadgets start sucking a wee bit more.


20 Ignored Great Ideas That Would Have Changed Everything

Hey, at least no one ever got a QR Code tattooed on their body, right?


The Bizarre Origins Of The Internet's Most Persistent Meme

One night I got wasted and decided I'd finally had enough Minion memes. So I decided to fire back at them in the most gangster way I knew how: I drafted a tweet about it.


7 Insane Problems We'll Have To Deal With In The Future

Our near-future will be filled with annoyances that will make us yearn for an ape and/or machine uprising.


5 Ways To Ruin Your Computer (Tested)

It turns out that a stubborn determination to fix something RIGHT NOW DAMMIT is not an especially good mindset when dealing with delicate, precision-oriented tasks.</p>


5 Nightmarish Realities Of Replacing Your Phone

My journey from phonelessness to re-enphonification took just hours of time, but the true cost was to my soul. In a way, I died that day.


6 Man-Made Things You Totally Thought Were 'Natural'

Hold on to your learnin' hats, because almost everything that we traditionally file in the 'natural' folder has been tampered with well beyond recognition.


The Awful Reality Of The Worst Fighting Game Ever

I got paid to play Final Slam 2. That's the way it should be. People should get a direct deposit of $4.00 every time they launch the game.


5 Simple Solutions That Would Make Facebook Bearable Again

Because of the nature of the Internet and just plain ol' dumbass human interaction, the longer Facebook is an entity, the stronger its IQ vacuum becomes.


22 Times Crazy Ideas Were The Only Ideas That Worked

When genius just isn't working, idiocy is your only option.


5 Lessons Found In The Worst Online Criticism (Really)

I take intelligent criticism to heart, but I even try to find value in the ... less than brilliant stuff that is so prevalent here on the Internet. And I think I can help everybody do the same.