Cracked Archive - Movies & TV

Before information was free and plentiful, mankind was forced to slowly acquire specialized skills from VHS instructional videos.

• By Seanbaby
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• April 17, 2012

All the lessons about guns you've learned from movies are wrong. That's right: Hollywood wants you dead.

• By Robert Evans
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• April 16, 2012

Every so often, The Editing Room swings by to give us abridged versions of popular movies. And we're all better people for it.

• By The Editing Room
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• April 12, 2012

Of all the lessons we can take from the cinematic fable 'Blade II', the most important one comes when Blade's friend, Scud betrays humanity for the chance to be a pet instead of livestock under the rule of vampires.

• By Soren Bowie
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• April 10, 2012

If you've ever bothered to stick around through the scroll, you may have realized that some of the same names keep popping up in all your favorite movies, and they aren't next to jobs like 'director' or 'Indiana Jones.' In fact, you've probably been a diehard fan of the following seven people your entire life without ever realizing it.

• By David Christopher Bell
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• April 09, 2012

Not everyone has karate skills that translate to film. If they did, then everyone would be Jean-Claude Van Damme. And now that I've given Jean-Claude Van Damme the plot for his next movie, let's talk about some of his colleagues.

• By Seanbaby
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• April 07, 2012

As everyone knows, the best part about sharing opinions is the chance to smugly tell other people that their opinions are wrong. Almost every heated movie discussion has someone pulling out one of these stupid, nonsensical lines.

• By Christina H
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• April 03, 2012

It turns out that some movies and shows that became enduring classics were dangerously close to being terrible, and we probably wouldn't be talking about them today if a few folks hadn't switched gears on the fly.

• By Evan V. Symon
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• April 02, 2012

No teenager still owns a stack of skin magazines, unless that teenager insists on living an ironic 1985-lifestyle.

• By C. Coville
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• April 02, 2012

Here is the account of one man's brief time spent in the 'Game of Thrones' universe, and all that he learned while there.

• By Daniel O'Brien
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• March 30, 2012

A look behind the scenes of the creative process that gave us the most irresponsible reboot currently in production ...

• By Robert Brockway
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• March 28, 2012

Although I take no pleasure in being the last bastion of morality in the world, as Cracked's only licensed killjoy, someone has to explain why we should not be enjoying these films and books so much.

• By Chris Bucholz
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• March 28, 2012

Old-time comics may be less violent and explicit than current ones, but that doesn't mean the heroes weren't sometimes colossal dicks while they saved the universe. If you don't believe us, let us tell you all about it.

• By Maxwell Yezpitelok, Diana McCallum
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• March 28, 2012

Thanks to several laws I'd broken, I had found out where my cyber-bully attended school, and with the help of an underfunded administration in desperate need of two cartons of Marlboros, I was able to enroll myself in the 7th grade of Alan Thicke Middle School.

• By Chris Bucholz
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• March 25, 2012

Dear Fine People of Hazleton Township, Pennsylvania, It is from the bottom of my heart and at the request of the West Hazleton Superior Court that I apologize to you all for what transpired last Saturday at the Hazleton Youth Center.

• By Daniel O'Brien
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• March 23, 2012