You might think that 'a movie about dirt bike jousting directed by George Romero' would pretty much cover all the bizarre stuff going on in this movie, but trust me on this: It is only the beginning.
So here's the deal. I compiled a list of the most insane things I do and then looked them up online to make my diagnosis.
How come stuff like this keeps happening?
Seriously, most of these characters use their incredible abilities to do one or two neat things and then forget they have them.
The reality is that lots of your favorite franchises had to suffer through ill-conceived false starts before rounding into shape, at which point their creators hoped you would forget all about the early efforts.
While I, of course, can't prove the naysayers 'wrong,' perhaps I can give them four tips to assist them in their viewing experience.
These are pure good vs. evil stories, and Supes is always on the good side. Right?
Sometimes a movie you've seen a million times will convince you it's about something very simple, when, in fact, there was a hidden meaning all along.
We've seen just about all of the grisly crime porn available, and most of it doesn't make for great comedy. That can't be said for the things on this list, though!
So any day now, expect E! News to report on the impromptu death match between these duos.
If you have sharp eyes and an observant mind, you're going to ruin a lot of movies for yourself. If not, that's what we're for.
The drive to make sure every story has a twist means that often we see the same ones over and over again.
2010's 'Predators' was serviceable, but it didn't have nearly enough governors.