Cracked Archive - Celebrities

The 5 Most Shocking Celebrity Twitter Feeds

Thanks to Twitter, for the first time in the history of ever, we have a one-way ferry boat ride into the inner thoughts of living celebrities, as they think them.

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The 7 Most Random Celebrity Duos Who Hung Out Before Fame

Fame makes a lot of strange bedfellows. Some would prefer you to remember their connections, like Peter Scolari with Tom Hanks. Others would rather you didn't bring it up, like Tom Hanks with Peter Scolari. And there are still others who started out together that you would've never even thought of.

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7 Celebrity Movie Deaths We Enjoyed Way Too Much

The success of magazines like People, Star and Us Weekly isn't predicated on how interested humanity is in Blake Lively's new dress, the issues sell because dental patients and grocery shoppers want to see if Blake Lively has caught on fire yet.

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What If Randy Quaid Isn't Insane?

In case you weren't aware, actor Randy Quaid has lost his marbles and thinks people are trying to murder him.

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Experimenting With Witchcraft And Christine O'Donnell

It was nearly the end of summer break, swim team season had come to a close and Christie and I didn't have summer jobs because all the poor kids took them. We burned the long afternoons under oak trees talking about our futures and which colleges we might like to pretend to graduate from once we were adults.

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The Shocking Truth Behind Justin Bieber Brand Nail Polish

Here at Cracked, perched atop our commitment to fabricated journalism like some kind of hilarious raven, we wondered if there was more to this whole nail polish thing. And, after a bit of fabrication, it turns out there was.

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The Monster Inside of Mario Lopez: A Warning

I can only hope the writings of a monster might convince you where mine continuously fail.

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How to Deal With Jealousy [COMIC]

Especially if it's warranted.

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What Andrew WK's Twitter Taught Me About Life

You will never love anything as much as Andrew WK loves partying.

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Who Actually Goes to Comic-Con [CHART]

Comic-Con has officially evolved into the Oscars for Hollywood's Hype Machine. Below, a look at who shows up these days, and how they feel about being there ...

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The 6 Most Misguided Causes Ever Made Famous by Celebrities

We wouldn't mind if celebrity causes were simply vapid or silly. But sometimes, they're down right evil.

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EXTRA! Mario Lopez has no soul!

His face is still frozen in a smile that bespeaks friendly recognition with a slight touch of modesty. His fingernails are piercing my skin.

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7 Celebrities Who Had Badass Careers You Didn't Know About

Several people who found fame later in life started out on a much different path. And if you're not still working at the first job you ever got, thank your lucky stars that you're in the same boat. Unless you operated a boat as your first job. Then, well, yeah. Sorry.

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If Tiger Woods' Apology Was Honest

It is a hard, lonely and, yes, ass-filled world.

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