Every year, politeness and powerful maternal forces in our lives make us write Thank You cards to our loved ones and acquainted ones. It's a format which encourages politeness but also, if we're being honest, quite a bit of forgettable inanity.
Here's what they'd look like if they had balls.
Chris Bucholz is a Cracked columnist and is so thankful, just the most thankful ever. As the author of the amazing novels, Freeze/Thaw and Severance he thinks you should definitely go buy both of those now. Join him on Facebook or Twitter.
For more check out 5 Weird Psychological Dangers of Giving People Gifts and The Worst Thank You Card Ever Sent.
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Sometimes it's just a matter of making the US Department of Defense look, like, REALLY cool.
Actual impending doom like global climate change or mass extinction just makes people bored.
In some cases, the Marvel source material just did better.