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31 Historical Truths We All Get Hilariously Wrong All the Time

By:: Brian C. Miller; Cracked Writers

September 27, 2023

31 Historical Truths We All Get Hilariously Wrong All the Time

If there’s one course that we need in school, it's a history of hats! Everyone talks about how school needs to teach kids how their taxes work, but no one is paying attention to the fact that we’re all walking around imagining the wrong hats on our ancestors. Cowboys weren’t into the classic “cowboy hat” aesthetic until way later than movies have led us to believe, and vikings never worse those classic horned helmets at all.

It’s not just hats, though: There are all sorts of historical truths we’ve been imagining incorrectly. It’s not entirely our fault; we weren’t there, and thereby only have pop culture to rely on. Below are some of the wildest examples, although we’re still really stuck on the hats thing…

30 George Washington Carver's Peanuts

BELIEF: George Washington Carver invented peanut butter. TRUTH: Carver invented lots of uses for peanuts and was way ahead of his time in his holistic environmental beliefs. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

29 Henry Ford and the Automobile

BELIEF: Henry Ford invented the automobile and/or the assembly line. TRUTH: Henry Ford didn't invent either. However, the Ford Company developed the moving assembly line for automobiles. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

28 Pilgrim Fashion

BELIEF: Pilgrims wore all black and buckle hats. Pilgrims dressed mostly TRUTH: in earth tones and would wear hats but without buckles. The fashion stereotype is probably based on one man, Edward Winslow. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

27 The Flat Earth

- t BELIEF: Medieval Europeans believed the Earth was flat. TRUTH: People knew the Earth was round by sixth century BC. The myth was started by people in the 1800s. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

26 White Statues

BELIEF: Classical statues were white. TRUTH: Ancient Roman and Greek statues used to painted bright colors but have faded over time. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

25 George Washington's Teeth

BELIEF: George Washington had wooden teeth. Washington had bad TRUTH: teeth and wore dentures made of human and animal teeth and alloys. His dentures may have been stained, making them appear wooden. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

24 Tie-Dye Hippies

CRACKED.COM 1967 1969 1967 If you immediately think of tie-dye when you think of the hippie scene of the Haight-Ashbury neighborhood in the '60s, think again. The forefathers of the hippie movement were definitely into long hair, but tie-dye wasn't a thing yet. They were more into vaguely South Asian designs. — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

23 Christmas for Chuckles

The Victorians saw Christmas as a time to have a laugh. Their Christmas card art included stuff like a child stuck in a teapot, mice riding lobsters, or a clown with a poker attacking a policeman's butt. CRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

22 Benjamin Franklin's Wild Turkey

Benjamin Franklin BELIEF: proposed a wild turkey be the official symbol of the U.S., instead of the bald eagle. TRUTH: Ben Franklin, in a private letter to his daughter, said the wild turkey would be a better symbol to represent the Society of the Cincinnati. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

21 Immigrants at Ellis Island

BELIEF: Immigrants' last names were Americanized at Ellis Island. TRUTH: The inspectors never even wrote down the names of the immigrants but checked the names against ships' passenger lists. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

20 Santa Claus and Coca-Cola

- Coca-Cola invented BELIEF: Santa Claus as we know him. TRUTH: In 1836, illustrator Thomas Nast originated the classic imagery of Santa Claus in a red suit, by combining him with Uncle Sam. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

19 The Great Wall in Space

The Great Wall of BELIEF: China is visible from space. TRUTH: The Wall isn't visible with the naked eye while an astronaut is in low orbit, but you can see it in photos taken from space. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

18 Napoleon's Height

CRACKED COM Napoleon wasn't really that short. Не was about 5'6. That was about 90 100 110 120 - 130 110 150 5 160 170 180 190 9 the average height of men at the time. 3 70 80 OF 09 10 50 - 10 20 30 — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

17 Samurais with Guns

CRACKED COM Samurai used guns and were proud of it. When firearms were introduced to Japan, many samurai and their men started using guns to replace bows as their main weapons. Using guns among samurai was not always considered a dishonorable act; in fact, guns later evolved to become a status symbol among samurai. — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

16 Easter Island Heads

If you're picturing Easter Island statues as disembodied heads, you're picturing them wrong. They're full-body sculptures, just mostly buried in the hillside. On purpose. CRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

15 Dinosaurs with Feathers

JURASSIC PARK'S VELOCIRAPTORS ARE MISSING THEIR FEATHERS. The real Velociraptor was the size of a turkey, with fully-feathered wings. Crichton's famous creatures are more like a predator named the Deinonychus. GRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

14 Albert Einstein's Math Classes

BELIEF: Albert Einstein failed math classes. Einstein confirmed he TRUTH: never failed math and was at the top of his class. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

13 Cowboy Hats and Cowboys

BELIEF: Cowboy hats were worn in beginning of the Western American frontier. TRUTH: The cowboy hat didn't become popular until after the American Civil War, thanks to heavy advertising by the hat manufacturer John В. Stetson. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

12 The Salem Witch Trials

BELIEF: Women were burned at the stake during the Salem Witch Trials. TRUTH: The accused died in prison, were hanged, or, in one case, were pressed to death.. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

11 The Pythagorean Theorem

a2 +b2 = c2 BELIEF: The Pythagorean theorem was discovered by Pythagoras. TRUTH: The theorem was used centuries before Pythagoras was born. Little is known about his actual work. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

10 The Taj Mahal

Taj Mahal is one of the seven wonders of the world, a representation of Paradise and a symbol of love. However, the nearby banks of the Yamuna River are covered in garbage which creates a perfect ground for insects to thrive. Slime and air pollution are slowly damaging the mosaics and marble surface of the monument. CRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

9 Gladiator Fight Referee

Gladiator fights weren't a gory free-for-all, but had strict rules and referees. One gladiator's tombstone inscription complains that a bad referee call killed him. CRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

8 Visual Scale of Art

When you experience art through computer screens and printed reproductions, you often get a false sense of the visual scale that is part of the historical works. 1 meter GRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

7 Surgery in the Civil War

SURGERY during the CIVIL WAR was not as painful as typically depicted. In fact, 95% of surgical procedures involved anesthesia by the use of chloroform. GRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

6 July 4th is August 2nd

for the futter Pedestin with calle Addition Previden are de كور مستور Hope John of Hancock Samual Name we 24 Bay . S BELIEF: July 4th was the day the US declared independence from Great Britain. TRUTH: Congress declared its independence from Britain on July 2, 1776. July 4th is the day the Declaration of Independence was approved by Congress. But the Declaration wasn't signed until August 2. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

5 Stock Broker Suicides

BELIEF: Many stock brokers jumped out of windows when the market collapsed. There were two jumping TRUTH: suicides between the crash and 1929. The myth of the common Wall Street suicide originated with a comedian's quip. CRACKED.COM — Source: 17 Historical (False) Facts

4 The Pyramids of Giza

CRACKED.COM If planing a trip to Egypt, don't expect your views of the Pyramids of Giza to be like this. Giza is a modern city and the Great Pyramids are right in the كم middle of it. You can even get a good view from inside Pizza Hut. — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

3 Vikings in Horned Helmets

Vikings did not wear horned helmets. Carl Emil Doepler is the main culprit behind this notion. Не included horned helmets as part of his costume design for the performance of Der Ring des Nibelungen. It then just kinda stuck. CRACKED COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

2 Cowboy Hats

Cowboys of the Wild West typically wore Bowler style hats. Stetson style cowboy hats were only popularized at the end of the 19th century. CRACKED.COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

1 African-American Cowboys

One in four cowboys were African-American. In the aftermath of the Civil War, being a cowboy was one of the most popular professions among former slaves. Although they still faced discrimination, they were well-respected among cowboys. CRACKED COM — Source: 18 Historical Moments That Get Pictured Wrong

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