15 Hall of Fame Jokes About Religion
Does God exist? If so, which religion is the right one? Which one is the wrong one? Does it even matter? As long as these questions remain, there is only one truth regarding religion: It makes for good comedy fodder.
Ever since the concept we’ve dubbed “God” has been discovered, uncovered or created, the need to poke fun at faith, the faithful and the faithless has existed. So, for your edification or damnation, here are some Hall of Fame-worthy jokes regarding religion...
Joe Mande’s Hanukkah Miracle
Don’t tell Mande’s dad. It’ll ruin his happiest memory.
Maz Jobrani Using His Laxed Muslim Faith to His Advantage
Jobrani goes into detail about using his faith to get out of getting a Christmas tree on Thanksgiving. It doesn’t go as planned.
Tiffany Haddish’s Scientology Experience
Haddish went on David Letterman’s My Guest Needs No Introduction and discussed how she was recruited to the Church of Scientology but parted ways with the faith due to one hard limit: bunk beds.
Tim Minchin’s Musical Atheism Sermons
Minchin’s zany songs get into theological criticism in the most whimsical way possible.
Hasan Minhaj Breaks Down the Differences Between Muslims and Hindus
Jim Gaffigan on His Strong Catholic Faith
“I don’t go to church or follow the church teachings, but I root for Notre Dame. So I’m Catholic.”
The Kids in the Hall Showed That God Is Dead (and Very Small)
‘Saturday Night Live’s Church Chat
Dana Carvey cemented himself in SNL history by creating one of the show’s most iconic recurring characters, the eponymous and judgmental Church Lady.
Grant Gordon Is Spiritually Scrambled
“I’m a confirmed Catholic, I’m a bar mitzvahed Jew and I’m a practicing Buddhist. I’m a Cajewbu, whatever that is. It’s weird because I always go in that order, too, with things. I always go Catholic, Jewish, then Buddhist. Take money, for example. First, I feel guilty for wanting it. Then I’ll do whatever it takes to get it. Then I just throw it all away.”
God Visits Key & Peele’s Prayer Group
Bill Burr Hates Going to Church
“The priest, they were like preaching, but they sounded like they didn’t believe it. They’d be like, ‘This is the Gospel… according to Luke. I’m not saying it happened, I’m not saying it didn’t happen, I’m just saying what Luke said.’”
Kathleen Madigan Discovers the Differences Between Catholics and Christians
George Carlin on Religion’s Bullshit
“Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of 10 things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these 10 things, he has a special place full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry until the end of time! But he loves you.”
Jenny Slate on the Differences Between Jews and Christians
“The synagogue I went to when I was a kid looked like a Chinese restaurant from the 1970s without windows, and it was such a bummer. And I went into this place and was like, ‘Holy shit, churches are just little castles for God.’”
Bill Hicks on Christian Marketing
“A lot of Christians wear a cross around their neck. Do you think when Jesus comes back, he’ll want to see a fucking cross? It’s kinda like going up to Jackie Onassis with a little sniper rifle pendant. ‘Hey Jackie, just thinking of John. We loved him.’”