Interdimensional Cable and Snake Watches: The Best and Worst Rick Inventions from ‘Rick and Morty’
Rick and Morty is a show about how people can be brilliant in one area and total morons in another. Case in point: Rick frequently thinking up potentially world-changing inventions but failing to consider some basic flaw that ruins everything, forcing him to ditch that world (and universe). Which is why we’re diving into some of the most mind-blowingly good and mind-blowingly terrible inventions to pop out of Rick Sanchez’s brain...
Best: Portal Gun
Let’s get this one out of the way fast: Yes, the portal gun rules. It can take you to other universes, other places within the same universe, or even split alien bug monsters in half before they can kill your grandson. Just, uh, try to avoid getting it hacked by an evil version of said grandson before he rigs it to create a black hole and kill everyone, if possible.
Worst: Save-Point Device (Or: “Needlessly Cruel Portal Gun”)
In theory, a device that creates a video game-type save-point in real life and lets you do whatever you want without consequences sounds like a lot of fun. In practice, it wasn’t, since Rick specifically designed it to torture Morty and teach him a valuable lesson about
consequences never daring to criticize Rick’s cool-ass ideas, especially if they involve fake vats of acid. In the end, that was the device’s only practical purpose: #$%@ing with a specific 14-year-old’s head.
Best: Interdimensional Cable Box
A cable box that lets you see gloriously stupid TV shows from other dimensions? Yes, please! It’s the only type of cable box anyone younger than 35 would allow into their home.
Worst: Abradolf Lincler
A morally confused clone of Abraham Lincoln and Adolf Hitler? No! Come on, no! Not even if he’s played by Taika Day-Lewaititi.
Best: A Watch With a Little Butt That Farts on People
Don’t pretend you wouldn’t constantly fart on your enemies with a little butt coming out of your watch if you had a watch that could do so. And yes, this invention was only created by Rick within his mind (as it was being hijacked by Galactic Federation agents), but then again, aren’t they all?
Worst: A Watch That Turns People into Snakes (Supposedly)
Speaking of wristwear, a watch that turns people into snakes would be a great invention... if Rick had actually invented it. Instead, he merely came up with a particle beam for his wristwatch and a snake holster for his leg. The actual invention here is “dishonesty,” and that’s never good, especially in front of your grandchildren.
Best: The Space Cruiser
A fully functional flying spaceship built out of stuff Rick found in the family’s garage, equipped with a complex defense system, a frighteningly smart A.I. capable of brokering peace agreements within species, and universes within universes inside its power battery. And the best part: Since it’s a flying vehicle, it’ll never crap out on you and start moving like a piece of junk when it gets a flat tire.
Worst: The Space Cruiser’s Flat Tire Simulator
Best: Jerry’s Instant Ovenless Brownies
Sure, this was invented by a dumber-than-average Rick, and sure, the original idea was supplied by an average-intelligence Jerry, but “brownies you can instantly materialize without an oven” is still a solid concept. All you need are... some chemicals that are probably harder to get than just buying brownies at the store. But still! Brownies!
Worst: Jerry’s Instant Psychopathic Fungus Head
Instead of using a voice modulator like a regular mad scientist, Rick fakes Jerry’s voice by pouring some sort of substance that grows into a fungus shaped like Jerry’s head, which he has to destroy with acid a few seconds later because it threatens to “eat the world.” That’s a universe-ending mishap waiting to happen right there.
Best: Rick’s Dance
Damn, Rick’s got moves. Not even Fortnite can make us get tired of this one.
Worst: Rick’s Song, “Get Schwifty”
This one got old before the episode was even over, though.
Best: Various Futuristic Armors
Rick could simply walk around with a force field on (and sometimes, he does), but where’s the fun in that? His various power armors and unnecessarily badass suit-up sequences are so awesome that they can achieve the impossible: making Jerry look cool in front of his family.
Worst: Star Wars™ Lightsaber™
Spoilers for the Season Six finale: the lightsabers from Star Wars SUCK. Why? Because if you ever drop them perfectly vertical, you’ve basically doomed the planet, and it’s a pain in the ass to undoom it. Turns out the Emperor could have saved a lot of money on Death Stars by just leaving one lightsaber unattended per planet and waiting for gravity to do its thing.
Like Rick himself once said, “Beth, my greatest invention... is you.” Right? Something like that? If that hasn’t happened yet, it’s definitely happening at some point, in some universe, because in the end, for all the good and bad he’s ever done, Rick’s love for his family is his greatest quality.
Worst: Beth’ s #$%@ed Up Childhood Toys
“A whip that forces people to like you”? “Teddy bear with anatomically correct innards”? “Mind control hair clips”? “A pink sentient switchblade”? Even the inventions that seem useful are rendered horrific by the fact that a little girl asked for them, and Rick made them. Maybe there is such a thing as loving your family too much.
Best: Butter Robot
It passes the butter!
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