Bill Burr Denies to Peyton And Eli Manning That He Punts for the Houston Texans As a Side Hustle

Last night, Bill Burr appeared on the “ManningCast,” Monday Night Football’s broadcast-turned-podcast hosted by legendary quarterbacks Peyton and Eli Manning. Ol’ Billy Red Face got to watch his beloved New England Patriots get trounced at home by the mighty Chicago Bears while he shot the breeze with two football greats and addressed an interesting rumor that’s been swirling about the cantankerous comic.

During the game, the Manning brothers pulled up an interesting graphic that sent Burr into a fit of nervous laughter while millions of viewers at home pondered the implications associated with a question asked by Peyton: “Have you ever been seen in the same room as Texans punter Cameron Johnston?” Burr suspiciously replied, “I’ve been advised not to comment at this time.” 

We’ll let you draw your own conclusions.

“Can I deal with the nightmare of talking to two Manning brothers? This is like the quarterback Antichrist for me,” Burr remarked when he was first introduced on the show. Burr lived up to his reputation as comedy’s crankiest Bostonian as ESPN cruelly forced the Monday Morning Podcast Host to answer questions about the Patriots’ Super Bowl losses in front of the quarterback responsible for those defeats, all while watching the 2022 Pats struggle to put up a fight against a superior opponent in the Bears. Gripes and groans defined his time on the show, which is exactly what comedy fans and non-Patriots fans alike had hoped for.

Burr was preceded on the program by former President Barack Obama, who said of the Mannings’ next guest, “Burr is actually a funny guy.” Eli wondered of the backhanded compliment, “Why did he have to say ‘actually?’” Burr remarked, “He called me by my last name like he’s coaching me. ‘Burr’s actually a funny guy, he got some good reps in.’”

After a graphic showed a comparison between Patriots coach Bill Belichick and his contemporaries among the list of all-time winningest NFL coaches, including George Halas of the Bears and the Dolphins’ Don Shula, Burr chortled, “That’s the best picture they could find? Don Shula looks like a mafia don, George Halas is smiling like he just met his grandkid for the first time... Belichick looks like he's getting indicted.”

But it wasn’t all bleating and bellyaching — Burr took the time to give credit where credit is due in the most Bill Burr way possible. He paid Peyton a much-deserved commendation about his comedy skills in a compliment that sounded suspiciously like a complaint, saying, “I have to say, as a comedian, Peyton, it really bugs me how funny you are. You crushed it on SNL.”

After the way Eli dismantled Burr’s Patriots, it’s unsurprising that Burr omitted mention of the younger Manning brother’s SNL chops.

Burr concluded his time on the Manningcast by thanking Peyton and Eli for bringing up all the Patriots’ Super Bowl losses without making any mention of their many wins. We’ll probably get an earful about the experience on next week’s Monday Morning Podcast, but if you’re hankering for more football content from Burr, you’ll see him on fourth downs this Sunday when his Texans take on the Las Vegas Raiders. 

Pin'em deep, Burr.