15 Halloween Candies And What They Say About The Person Giving Them Out

15 Reese’s Cups

This is someone comfortable with themself, who understands exactly how much fun Halloween is without trying to overthink it. You may not be the house sending whispers down the block and becoming a must-visit destination, but your candy will never find itself sorted off to the side or used as trade bait. And there’s a powerful confidence in that.

14 Oh Henry!

Be very kind to the person giving out Oh Henry bars, because they will be gone before next Halloween.

13 Butterfinger

Butterfingers are just a LOT, in my opinion. And they give off the same vibe about the person giving them out. Adults that give out Butterfingers feel like they’re also going to try to tell the kids they used to be able to kickflip. You’re 40, man.

12 Hershey’s Chocolate

It’s a kind gesture, but it’s also weirdly chaste. Hershey’s milk chocolate is the last step before something is just Not Candy. It’s like something an amish child would get a brick of for finishing their chores.

11 Smarties

This is some freak s**t to give out, honestly. Even for the most nightmarish candy fiend of a child, finishing a full tube of Smarties is psycho behavior. Smarties are the meth of candy.

10 Necco Wafers

Necco Wafers are candy for the sort of person who whips themself on the back with a willow rod whenever they think about masturbating.

9 Twix

Simple. Classic. Perfect. No notes. Seeing a Twix in your little pail is like seeing your friend across the room at a party.

8 Milky Way

Milky Way is both classic and lavish. The sheer amount of various sugar-based substances contained make it a guilty pleasure even among the candy community. When I eat a Milky Way I hear the voice of Black Phillip in my head whispering “Wouldst thou like nougat and caramel in equal measure?”

7 Candy Corn

I’m not even going to get into the cliche jokes about the edibleness of candy corn, there’s not even a way to give it out without it feeling like something from a reverse dentist’s office. Either somebody’s wrinkly old hand is sprinkling it into your bucket like they’re feeding a pigeon or it’s in weird little cellophane packets that always feel like they came out of a drawer 2 seconds ago.

6 Skittles

Skittles have strong kooky aunt energy. The houses where you get Skittles usually have a lady wearing bold statement glasses or a guy who plays some weird sort of music like “rock saxophone.”

5 Dark Chocolate

I don’t know how to fully explain this but giving dark chocolate to children feels borderline sexually inappropriate.

4 3 Musketeers

The kind of person you never mind seeing at a party but you’re also not texting if they’re not there, you know?

3 Atomic Fireballs

Just a very chaotic, aggressive energy, giving out Atomic Fireballs. Kind of a goblin vibe.

2 Warheads

Cool uncle but also a little evil. The kind of guy who’d sneak you your first beer when you’re underage at a barbecue and then laugh when you almost throw up.

1 Mounds

Why don’t you just hand the candy directly to their parents, at this point?

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