4 Wild Tales Of Celeb Encounters With Aliens
Celebrities are just like us: they all poop, they all brush their teeth, and they all have that one friend who swears they've met beings from other planets or realms of existence. Some of them are that friend. After all, who better to illuminate us on what lies beyond the stars than the stars themselves? Starting with ...
Van Halen's Sammy Hagar Had Something "Uploaded" Into His Mind By An UFO
When '80s rock god Sammy Hagar was preparing his autobiography around 2010, his co-writer convinced him that all his fans were interested in was stuff like Van Halen's "sex tents" (literally, tents where he would nail groupies under the stage during the 20-minute guitar solos) -- but what Hagar really wanted to write about was aliens and the time they hacked into his head.
Hagar claims he saw his first UFO "floating across a field" when he was about four years old, at which point he did what any kid living in the country would do upon being faced with a marvel of science: he threw rocks at it. But his most memorable and life-changing alien encounter came when he was a teenager in the mid-1960s. One night around 4 am, Hagar says he suddenly found himself "connected" to two beings inside some sort of spaceship floating over a nearby hill. He felt like they were tapping into his head and "programming" him via some sort of invisible 13-mile wire, or what we now call wireless technology.
Hagar once described the experience as "a download situation" -- like they were either downloading or uploading something into his brain, presumably precise instructions for how to build an effective sex tent. He says that once the aliens realized he was waking up, they "yelled out a numerical code, not of our numerical system," and aborted the connection, leaving his mind stuck in a white void for a moment before it snapped back to his body in his bed. Hear him narrate this transcendental experience to renowned ufologist Kesha in her podcast:
Speaking of Kesha, let's talk about the Master Yoda to her Luke Skywalker ...
Demi Lovato Can Summon Aliens Telepathically
Demi Lovato (who goes by they/them) isn't just into aliens -- aliens, Lovato claims, are into them too.
The former Disney kid says their interest in this stuff started after they were celebrating their 28th birthday in the middle of the desert in California, as one does, when a bunch of bright lights decided to crash the party. After that, Lovato hooked up with UFO expert Steven Greer, who taught them how to summon UFOs via the power of meditation. Lovato claims they managed to attract a ball of blue light this way, but it was shy and kept floating away from them. Perhaps reasoning that the blue ball would be more comfortable in a more intimate setting, Demi told it to "Meet me in my dreams" -- and it accepted the invitation.
Later that night, Demi says they "fully astral projected" to a "pink-and-purple planet that was very Dr. Seuss-like" ... minus the racist stuff, hopefully. Lovato has since gone all-in on their new hobby, hosting a docuseries about alien abductions on Peacock and even stating publicly that, at this point, they'd rather date an extraterrestrial than another human being (we're assuming they got 25 thirsty DMs from @officialALF minutes after the interview was posted). Lovato has since developed their own techniques to summon aliens like, for instance, by performing acapella renditions of their 11-year-old hits in what appears to be the set from one of the Paranormal Activity movies.
As for Kesha, she says that after having Lovato on the show, she told her family that "All I want for Christmas is for us all to meditate and try to channel extraterrestrials." She added: "I'm like trying to get all my friends and family into meditating the aliens to us. It's my new hobby because of Demi Lovato." Adorable! But also, we're pretty sure this is exactly how Scientology started.
Robbie Williams Gets So Many UFO Visits That He Needs 24/7 Anti-Alien Security
What do you do when you're one of the biggest pop stars in the world, and your latest album's sales are so crappy that two senior record company executives are sacked? You grow a beard and go look for UFOs in Nevada, yes. Or at least that's what Robbie Williams did in 2008, as documented by the journalist who tagged along for the ride.
As Williams confessed to the journalist, he'd fallen into the habit of watching UFO documentaries and reading dodgy conspiracy theory websites while taking a break from the "being one of the biggest pop stars in the world" thing and was now obsessed with making alien contact. He even went looking for underwater aliens in Malibu and joked (we think?) about "stopping being a pop star and being a full-time ufologist."
Williams' quest for extraterrestrial life eventually worked ... perhaps a little too well. First, he was on the patio of a hotel one night when the sky blacked out, and he saw some sort of "square object" that "hovered for a while and then moved on." He later said that if he'd had a tennis ball at the moment, he could have hit the UFO with it (and possibly triggered a war with the Borg from Star Trek about 400 years too early).
Then, Williams says a big ball of gold light showed up over his balcony while he was playing a freshly-written song about alien abductions. The ball went away when the song cut off but reappeared when Williams started playing it again. He says this "happened four times," so clearly aliens enjoy being serenaded. Another time, a "big strip of black light" suddenly appeared in his studio and then "shot from one end of the room out of the window," presumably after noticing that he was singing about angels or some other boring crap like that.
By 2012, Williams was apparently fed up with the subject: he complained that his UFO obsession was "a PR nightmare" and had made him "weird and fat." In 2019, he said he had to install 24-hour security at his home because he was freaked out by all the paranormal stuff happening around him -- which, to be fair to the aliens, wasn't limited to space visitors since he says he was also visited by the ghost of Mama Cass from The Mamas & the Papas. Then again, Williams kind of invited that sort of weirdness into his life when he started hanging out with ...
Comics Writer Grant Morrison Was Shown Our Universe From The Outside
Grant Morrison is one of the most influential writers in comics, having worked in stuff like Batman, Doom Patrol, X-Men, and Robbie Williams' 2005 album Intensive Care. It was Morrison and artist Frank Quitely who designed that weird cover with Williams seemingly pressing his finger to the camera, and they claim that if enough people press back on the magic symbol Morrison put there, "the world will most certainly enter a new Golden Age of peace, creativity, and prosperity."
How do you become so successful as a comic book writer that you end up hanging out with rock stars? In Morrison's case, it was easy: simply go to Kathmandu and do a bunch of drugs every day until you're abducted by beings from a higher dimension. (Morrison stresses that none of the drugs were hallucinogenics, though.)
Morrison says these "blobs of chrome"-looking beings took them out of their body and transported them first to the Alpha Centauri star system and then outside of space and time, where they revealed the purpose of this trip: showing Morrison that our universe only exists to grow larvae. And that larvae is ... us, since from an atemporal perspective, we all exist in every place we've ever visited at the same time, forming a massive network of Human Centipedes covering every inch of our planet. Plus a little bit of the moon and Alpha Centauri, presumably.
The blobs wanted Morrison to make the rest of us understand that in the end, we're all the same organism, and when we hurt each other, we're hurting us all. And the best way to communicate that, according to Morrison? Superman comics, of course (later adapted as Superman animated movies).
They were right, of course. Screw CD album thumb magic; the world would be at least 15% better if everyone in the world saw or read that one scene.
Thumbnail: Ralph Arvesen/Wiki Commons