Science fiction holds that in the future, we'll all be doing pretty much the same things we do today, just in an unnecessarily futuristic way. We'll all have flying cars, even though most people can barely handle the ground-based ones. Every call will be a video call, despite the fact that we don't call each other anymore, let alone want to see each other. Food will be in pill form, because humanity will place more value on nutrition than flavor (Doritos Locos tacos laugh cynically at that one). And now, according to Glenlivet, we'll all be getting hammered in a more sustainably futuristic way too. Thanks to seaweed Tide Pods.
Available exclusively during London's cocktail week event, Glenlivet has loaded three whiskey-based cocktails into little edible grub worm packets that burst open when you bite them. Glenlivet is a classy brand, and there's no classier way to get drunk than getting a whiskey money shot from an adult Gusher.
Fine scotch whiskey like Glenlivet is typically sipped in good times and chugged from the bottle in the bad. This capsule offers a less contemplative drinking experience, which means every use is by definition a bad time. Should they ever be mass-produced, they'll be a huge hit in the frat community, where feral packs of bros will hold pod-eating competitions in their continued effort to innovate in the field of alcohol poisoning. After all, why sip scotch while staring out of a rainy window when you can shovel fistfuls of them in your mouth like squishy bitter candy?
Also, we'd love to know more about you and your interesting lives, dear readers. If you spend your days doing cool stuff, drop us a line at iDoCoolStuff at Cracked dot com, and maybe we can share your story with the entire internet.
Follow us on Facebook. Because we said so.