Sarah Huckabee Sanders announced she would start press briefings by reading an email or letter. People seem to think this is shameless propaganda made up by Trump's press team, but-
"My name Dylan but every body calls me Pickle. I'm 9 years old and you are my favrit President."
Well this still isn't proof that they're making it up, I mean I'm sure that plenty of children would want to- wait, did he say his name is Pickle?
"I like you so much I had a birthday about you."
Lots of kids have themed birthday parties, it's still believable, and it's not like he says he made a cake effigy of Trump or anything.
"My cake was the shape of your hat."
Uhm. Okay. I mean. That's a bit unusual. But kids like cakes in the shape of things, and I suppose a MAGA hat is a shape that a cake could take. But hold on I'm just... again, his name is Pickle, though? That sounds familiar... oh right, it's the actual name of Mike Pence's cat. So out of all the possible human nicknames, this real boy's happens to be Pickle? Hmm.
"How old are you? How big is the white house?"
Phew, normal kid questions. Pickle might be a real, breathing child! A child who has the uncanny ability to mail a letter without there being any visible creasing where it would have been folded and place in an envelop, but still.
"How much monny do you have?"
Okaaay, getting a little bit in the territory of what an adult would think a child wants to know about them, but still... Pickle might just be inquisitive.
"I don't know why people don't like you."
"You seem nice can we be friends?"
"My pitcher is in here so if you see me you can say hi. Your friend, Dylan."
Wait, excuse me? Why didn't he sign it "Pickle?" Something isn't adding up, here.