10 Cracked Posts Everyone Went Nuts Over Last Week - 11/29


"Here at Cracked, we love a good easter egg. Video games get an extra leg up on other forms of entertainment because game developers make you really earn that shit."

"It turns out that many of the awesomest stories had to be paved over by the bullshit you memorized in order to protect your teachers and parents from awkward conversations."

"Admit it: Your perception of history comes mostly from Hollywood blockbusters and skewed textbooks."

"If you're having a hard time with this whole living thing, then we're here to help."

"Sure, he ties Luke up and delays him for a second, but that only lasts until Han Solo accidentally smashes into his jetpack with a pole and sends him tumbling into a man-eating sand vagina, screaming like a Muppet."

"A key requirement for a song's catchiness is that the singer has to be male. The researchers speculate that we're tapping into some inherent psychological intuition to follow male tribal leaders into battle."

If People Who Sell Stuff Were Honest About Black Friday

Attention shoppers! Prepare your spears and magic helmets!

"We even turn it into a competition by arbitrarily limiting the time these 'great bargains' will be available, which is enough to turn many of you into blood-thirsty Vikings!"

"The news can seem like a crossover between the Saw franchise and Groundhog Day."

"Every so often, we like to take a break from writing too many words about superheroes and let some of our friends take over for a little while."

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In the future, all video-game-release success will be measured by the "Pornhub Scale."

10 Cracked Posts Everyone Went Nuts Over Last Week - 11/29

"A quick look at the news should make you thankful that you're not currently running and screaming from some disaster or another."

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