Around this time, the government announced a military exercise code-named Jade Helm 15 (the same one that has our pal the Texas governor so concerned) which will take place in the exact same states where Walmart closed the stores. Except for Oklahoma and Florida. Oh, and with the addition of Nevada, Utah, Colorado, Arizona, and New Mexico, where no stores have been closed. But other than that, it's the exact same states, which is confirmation that the government is planning on invading and imposing martial law over the region. This raises some questions, such as: 1) Why would the government invade a region it already controls? 2) Why would the arrival of the new world order be heralded via a press release? 3) Why are you asking so many questions? Holy shit, this guy is in on it! Shoot him!
As for how, exactly, Walmart factors into it: Once the government starts taking over, the brave individuals who don't bow to this Obamination will be taken to the stores and held there for extended periods of time, surrounded by sweat, smell, and the darkest depths of human misery. So it'll be business as usual, then. Meanwhile, the military will be able to travel from state to state through a network of underground tunnels that totally exist under the Walmarts.
Also, China! China's government is involved in this, somehow. We know because a woman saw a Chinese person working at a Walmart. Well fuck, they should have started there. Now we're scared.