The Blood Runs Like a River Through My Dreams Is Outrageous Bullshit
Brace yourselves, because the book's title is the least ridiculous part of this story.
The Blood Runs Like a River Through My Dreams is the critically lauded first book by an author known only as Nasdijj, who tells the story of his adopted son who died from fetal alcohol syndrome. The book was a hit, so Nasdijj followed it up with another autobiographical work, this one about the other kid he adopted, who had AIDS. Holy shit, this guy can't catch a break.
Incipit Nova Vita
Two seconds after this picture was taken, that dog spontaneously combusted.
Nasdijj was hailed as an important new voice in the world of nonfiction, and his books became popular for their raw description of Native American life. What's that? We didn't mention he was claiming to be Native American? Huh, probably should have started there.
We weren't being completely accurate when we said The Blood was Nasdijj's first book -- years earlier and under a different name, he'd published novels with names like Mineshaft or My Brother, My Lover. We'll let you guess what the plot is about.
Gay Sunshine Press
OSHA approved mouth-to-mouth resuscitation
Yep, the solemn Nasdijj was actually a gay leather bondage porn writer, but there's nothing wrong with using a pseudonym to hide the fact that you used to write something embarrassing, like hardcore erotica or list comedy articles. There is, however, a lot wrong with pretending to be Native American when you're a white dude named Tim Barrus (as you'd think writers would fucking get by now), and with writing "real" books about your dead children who never existed.
Barrus and his ex-wife did adopt an autistic boy in the '70s, but he didn't die; they gave him up. It also turned out that this wasn't Barrus' first shot at the autobullshitography genre -- in the 1980s, he was blacklisted from the gay erotica industry (a not unimpressive feat) for passing off other writers' stories as his own, and in the '90s, he wrote a book about his nonexistent affair with a commanding officer during his nonexistent tour in the Vietnam War.
He was excused from military service due to a gross penile deformity.
After LA Weekly published an expose of him called "Navahoax" (obviously), Barrus/Nasdijj fessed up to the entire thing, and he now lives a simple life somewhere in America, most likely stalking fanfiction.net for ideas for his next juicy novel.
Vann Vicente is a college student who lives in a jungle in the Philippines. You can check him out on Twitter @vannisokay or send him an email at email@example.com.
Related Reading: Speaking of lies, check out these oddly specific lies we believe about foreigners. And for your further edification, our forum members have put together a list of lies you've read online today, revised for accuracy. Hey, did you know your favorite companies (including Apple) have gone to court for the right to lie to you? It's sad but true.