Complete with a flame-bearded announcer straight out of The Hunger Games, Hip Show features full-contact team martial arts fighting with an added twist: It takes place inside a mazelike three-level obstacle course. If you're wondering how throwing down in a group brawl while standing precariously near the edge of raised platforms could possibly be a good idea, we humbly submit that it is not a good idea. It is the best idea.
f**k you, sliced bread!
Fights consist of two-on-two teams flailing their way through three two-minute rounds, with the use of joint locks and choke holds prohibited during the first two rounds because we paid to see some face punching, goddammit. As you can imagine, teamwork is essential -- the moment one partner drops, the arena transforms into a two-against-one death maze. And since being inactive is also against the rules, anyone caught hiding behind the obstacles is subjected to immediate execution by bear mauling. Or disqualification. Whatever. It's Russia -- the bear mauling is implied.