Woody Harrelson's Dad Was a Contract Killer
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Woody Harrelson has enjoyed a long and fruitful career, with such memorable roles as Woody on Cheers and a recent turn as a detective on True Detective. He also frequently plays Jesse Eisenberg's stepfather. Woody is such a likeable, laid-back guy that it's hard to believe his father was a cold-blooded contract killer who murdered people at the behest of criminals.
Scott Griessel/iStock/Getty Images We had our money on long-haired Deadhead marijuana activist at 3-1 odds.
Charles Harrelson walked out on his wife and three sons in 1968, which was only the third worst thing he did that year. After being acquitted for a murder he probably committed thanks to a bush league prosecutor, Charles was hired to kill another person so the victim's business partner could collect insurance money. Amazingly, he got off again, this time on a mistrial, because Texas' judicial system in the '60s was apparently the equivalent of a first-turn guess in a game of Clue. Let that sink in -- Charles Harrelson killed two people in one year and got away with it both times.
The state got their shit together and tried Charles again five years later, sentencing him to 15 years in jail. Prison straightened Charles out, and he dedicated the rest of his life to his family. This is another way of saying that he got out of prison after serving only five years of his sentence and immediately murdered a judge. The parole board was batting a thousand that year.
moodboard/moodboard/Getty Images "But what about all the people we paroled who didn't commit murder?"
The judge in question had a reputation for tough sentences, and Charles was hired to kill him by a drug dealer who was about to stand trial. Shockingly, their plan to avoid punishment for a major crime by committing a second major crime didn't work out, and everyone involved went to prison. This story was actually referenced in No Country for Old Men, a film that featured Woody Harrelson getting murdered by a character who, according to the brother of one of Charles' victims, is eerily similar to Charles himself. That's like an Escher painting brought to horrible life.
straight up Picasso." width="350" height="189" class="lazy" data-src="https://s3.crackedcdn.com/phpimages/article/0/0/5/269005.jpg?v=1" />Miramax Films/Paramount VantageAlthough Chigurh's hair is straight up Picasso.