Supermarkets are also designed to keep movement as slow as possible, with displays stuck in the middle of aisles to create bottlenecks, strategically placed cart-slowing carpets and smaller floor tiles in expensive aisles (cart wheels click faster over them making you think you're traveling quicker and thus you subconsciously slow down). Oh, and we suspect something might be up with every shopping cart on the planet having at least one bad wheel.
Using Your Kids Against You
Walk into any supermarket and you'll be greeted at the door by the mash-up of smooth jazz and at least a dozen squalling children. Candy, cookies and all the diabestest cereals are usually grouped together in a single aisle feared by mothers everywhere, with the most expensive stuff all shelved at kiddie eye-level. Some supermarkets even offer kid "cooking" classes, which teach a lot more about brand recognition than cooking. Your kid might not know his ABCs, but at least he knows I Can't Believe It's Not Butter now has even more butter taste.
If your mother loved you, she'd buy you this.
"Deals" That are Anything But
Most sales or discounts actually cost you money as typically only the most expensive items are marked down (your 10-cents off five pounds of beluga caviar coupon might not be the hot bargain you think it is). Beware "Buy 5 for 5.99!" style offers, as frequently it's actually less expensive to buy the items individually.
Also your friendly neighborhood grocer isn't afraid to blatantly steal from you at the checkout, just ask the guy who, unlike most, decided to actually pay attention to the scanner at a supermarket where you got free items if you were overcharged. By the end of the year he took home $4,000 in free food.
Grab Bag of Douchebaggery
Supermarkets keep the lights too bright and Muzak overly loud because making you uncomfortable will keep you from making smart shopping decisions. Even those delicious cubes of cheese on toothpicks they give you are a scam (they don't care about selling you cheese, they just want to get your gastric juices flowing). We suggest next time you're hungry you save yourself a headache, grab a rock and see if you can't nail yourself a squirrel for dinner.