Cracked Columnists

Paul Is Dead...

pmccartney1.jpg... dead tired of coming up with names for albums, that is.

The former Beatle, Wing, walrus, and guy who made a one-legged woman cry told reporters recently that the title for his new CD, Memory Almost Full, was inspired by an error message on his cellphone:

"It seemed symbolic of our lives today," the 65-year-old said Monday. "Your messages are always full. And your mind is full. And it doesn't matter if you're my age or 20. I think that we all need to delete stuff every so often."

In keeping with this naming strategy, here are my predictions for Paul's next ten albums:

  • Permanent Fatal Error
  • Do Not Operate Heavy Machinery
  • The Number You Have Reached Has Been Disconnected or Is No Longer in Service
  • Remove Label Before Placing in Microwave
  • If More Than the Amount Used for Brushing is Swallowed, Contact a Poison Control Center Immediately
  • Silica Gel: Do Not Eat
  • Phenylketonurics: Contains Phenylalanine
  • Processed in a Facility Which Handles Peanuts
  • The Coffee You Are About to Enjoy is Very Hot
  • Do Not Resuscitate

Recommended For Your Pleasure

To turn on reply notifications, click here

3 Comments

The Cracked Podcast

Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!