14 More of the Most Unintentionally Gay Rap Lyrics Ever
As we chronicled in our previous installment, context can be everything when talking about song lyrics. It's easy to pull one line from a homophobic tough-guy gangsta rapper that, on its own, makes him sound ravenously gay.
So let's do that now.
#14.
Canibus - "Second Round K.O."
The Lyric:
"You might got more cash than me, but you ain't got the skills to eat a nigga's ass like me."
|
What He's Probably Saying: "Despite what your extravagant wealth may imply, I am, in fact, the more superior rapper and can destroy the ego of any opponent." |
What We Like To Think He's Saying: "You might be rich, but you will never toss a salad the way I do." |
#13.
Ice-T - "99 Problems"
The Lyric:
"I got a bitch who's a man"
|
What He's Probably Saying: "That dude is a bitch!" |
What We Like To Think He's Saying: "That dude is my transvestite girlfriend!" |
#12.
Mac Dre - "Back N Da Hood"
The Lyric:
"I need some cock hella bad, I need to be free. Steady dreaming about wrecking guts and cock. Laying on my bunk busting nuts in socks."
|
What He's Probably Saying: "You know what sucks? Being in jail. I need to get out of here. Seriously, I need some pussy. I dream about it every night. Whoa, don't put that sock on!" |
What We Like To Think He's Saying: "Jail is lonely as shit. I just sit around beating off and wishing I was free. Maybe I'll feel better if I get some dick." |
#11.
Sheek Louch - "Good Love"
The Lyric:
"Now I'm in the club, no V.I.P.
I'm down low where every last hoodlum be
I feel baby boy tryin to ice grill me
Walk up to him, you know nice and polite
Let him now it's real, lift the shirt up light
I'ma let it off cause I ain't tryin to fight"
|
What He's Probably Saying: "So I'm in the club, right? And I mean in the club, not up in V.I.P. or some weak stuff like that. Anyway, I'm walking around and I see this dude eying me. So I walk over to him, and I'm all, 'Hello sir, I'm not here for fisticuffs, but I will shoot you. With my gun.'" |
What We Like To Think He's Saying: "So I'm in the club. I'm on the down low... I think you know what I mean. Anyway, I see this guy checking me out. So I walk over to him, but I'm kind of shy around dudes. I didn't really know what to say so I just sorted lifted my shirt up and showed him my abs. He seemed offended so I'm like, 'Relax, I don't want to fight, I'm just hoping to let one off. On your chest or face, if possible.'" |
#10.
N.E.R.D. - "Rockstar"
The Lyric:
"Guess you ain't heard that we swallow guys."
|
What He's Probably Saying: "You may not know this, but we're very monster-like in the way we approach confrontation." |
What We Like To Think He's Saying: "In case you haven't heard, we swallow, guys." |
#9.
N.E.R.D. - "Lap Dance"
The Lyric:
"I dare a motherfucker to come in my face."
|
What He's Probably Saying: "Seriously, I wish a motherfucker would step in my face. They'll get knocked the fuck out." |
What We Like To Think He's Saying: "Go ahead, blow that hot load in my face. I dare you!" |
#8.
Ghostface Killah featuring Jadakiss - "Run"
The Lyric:
Jadakiss: I might gotta take my shirt off
Ghostface: Yeah, kid
Jadakiss: I like that one
Ghostface: Uh-huh, go in, go in
|
What They're Probably Saying: Jadakiss: I'm very excited right now. So much so that I may even take my shirt off. |
What We Like To Think They're Saying: Jadakiss: I'm getting really hot right now. I should probably take my shirt off. |
Has anyone mentioned:
Reply"You look so good huh, I suck on your daddy's dick "
from Notorious BIG's "Me and My Bitch"?
Luniz- I got 5 on it. "I take sacks to the face, whenever i can" Pretty gay.
ReplyMake a new one kthx.
ReplyI loved N.E.R.D.'s 'Rockstar' in high school, but I have to admit that line always made me uneasy. This was a really good article.
ReplyThis is easily the funniest Cracked article I have read.. I laughed the whole way through it!
ReplyBring his topic back. We need 15 more (part III) Unintentionally gay rap lyrics, like, tomorrow, yo.
ReplyJadakiss: I'm getting really hot right now. I should probably take my shirt off.
ReplyGhostface: Yeah, take it off.
Jadakiss: You have a lovely ass.
Ghostface: I know. You should put your boner in it.
I spit water out on my desk, GOLD!
Ha! I get it now, they are all gay! What's so funny about that?
ReplyDamnit, I'm so white, I needed the "what he's probably saying" just to understand these lyrics...
ReplyPharrell is so cute. I would tap that.
ReplyThanks for ruining my childhood... I used to love N*E*R*D* when I was a kid
ReplyI always thought Canibus was kinda gay for that line
ReplyO.K. number 4 was just straight up gay...no other interpretation...
ReplyNot to mention like 4 bars later he says, "Ya'll niggas remind me of a strip club, cuz everytime I come around it's like I just gotta get my dick sucked"
"Creeping niggas in the dark, triggers with no heart, rippin' ass apart, I be swimming with the sharks now." - Method Man
ReplyThey missed one. "Some MC's don't like KRS but they must respect him, 'cuz they know this kid gets all up in they rectum"-haha (MC's Act Like They Don't Know)
Replyyessss. KRS is really good at that stuff, haha. He also has that "Public Enemy, like a public enema, that gets way up in your buttocks" bit too. Apparently this man is just obsessed with poo.
I love how at the bottom of the article was an ad for gay dating :)
Reply Hide All See All 5 Repliesmine was for "real men do it HerWay" lol
mine was for woodland park zoo but it said in really big letters "Get Real Close." i think there might be a conspiracy.
Mine was for a Honda, but in big letters it said "you'll like what you see."
It's getting a little abstract now: "Big Box. 5 storage centres across Sussex. Secure self storage for just £1 per day!" There's a picture of what appears to be a couple putting their child into a cardboard box. Baffling.
Honda: You should put your boner in it.
I love rap, especially hardcore gangsta s**t and I have now read the funniest s**t ever on cracked (just passed all the f**ked up bible s**t they talk about)but I got a beef with #4. The lyric as I remember hearing it is " All you mens been to jail before suck my dick" insinuating that if you've been to jail then your a c**ksucker by default.....I wonder if he still beleives that now that he's spent some time???
ReplyGangsta Rap can sound really gay in the minds of people who speak in a normal vocabulary.
ReplyI mean these are if you squint hard enough...I know there are some lyrics out there that made me go what the hell...some song about pitching and catching blew my mind but yeah not sure about most of these.
ReplyThat Pun line really is pretty upfront. When you awaken you're gonna see that your nuts have been cut off. How could you have missed that. Otherwise this list was great.
Reply