Imagine everything that goes into a toilet -- now, imagine it all frozen together. Sometimes you have to chop up big blocks of shit. Tampons are the worst because once they've gone into the toilet, they've expanded. Then, they freeze, so they're too big to suck up with the hose, so you have to chop them up or just go in with a pair of pliers and pull them out. When a urinal gets plugged, people keep pissing in it, and when that happens in the winter time, you end up with a giant block of piss. What makes those such a pain in the ass is that you have to take a blowtorch and go under the urinal just to get it thawed enough to loosen it and then you put on gloves and just grab the big block of piss.
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Maybe if Luke and Han had thought of that, Tauntauns wouldn't have made them gag so much.
You Can Assess The Area's Political Tensions By Its Port-A-Potty Graffiti
For some reason, as soon as bathroom walls became a thing, people started writing on them. Apparently, they just sat down and thought, "While I'm here, I should record my opinions for the edification of others," and we've been doing it ever since. But, these rabid, mindless scrawlings aren't entirely without value -- you can actually gain a lot of insight into a culture by looking at what they write on bathroom walls. I had no idea how adamant people were about expressing their political opinions while shitting.
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"One-ply!?! THANKS, OBAMA!"
For example, a lot of the construction sites are primarily Hispanic, and I couldn't even tell you how many anti-Hispanic slurs that I have removed. There's a lot of anti-immigration, anti-Obama type of stuff. I'm not talking "Obama sucks" -- I'm talking about calling for the beheading of Obama and the raping of his children. Just think of the worst idea of a conservative, feed him a couple of Sharpies, and have him blow ink everywhere. That's what I'm removing, on a daily basis.
Really, bathroom walls were the original Internet: a faceless, anonymous way for terrible people to spread their shit, even while shitting. You find out what people are really like when they can speak their minds without consequences. It's almost a shame to clean it off because archaeologists could dig these things up centuries from now and get an utterly fascinating picture of our society. Oh, wait, that's already happened.
"Apollinaris, the doctor of the emperor Titus, defecated well here."
On this one toilet, someone had taken a pen and actually etched a racial slur into the side of the toilet. I couldn't get it off, so I had to take a knife and cut it out. The next week, somebody had taken a Sharpie and written, "You can't erase hate." Those four simple words explain so much about so many things, and you're not going to get them from anyone with a microphone in their face. If you want honesty from people, you have to catch them with their pants down.
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Check out Robert Evans' A Brief History of Vice: How Bad Behavior Built Civilization, a celebration of the brave, drunken pioneers who built our civilization one seemingly bad decision at a time.