Remember the first time you saw a platypus as a kid and for a moment refused to believe that nature would really create an animal that looks like a duck had sex with a beaver? Well guess what, the world is actually full of bizarre mashup creatures like that, some of them hilarious and some of them terrifying, all of them looking like the result of
Nobody wants to know where their food comes from. Still, it's worth paying attention to, because some of what's going on behind the scenes is downright weird.
Just in case you were considering sleeping easy this Halloween, or ever again, we're pleased to let you know that there are plenty of killers out there who would be right at home in anything John Carpenter could pull out of his ass.
If you really want a tourist experience that will make your loved ones demand 'What the Christ were you thinking?' then we have a few recommendations for you.
If you were unlucky enough to be born with a passion for something lame, follow the lead of these people and turn your ridiculous pastime into an audacious display of badassery.
Gene meddling isn't immune to awesomeness. Sometimes, just sometimes, what comes out from the test tube is a lot less Cthulhu and more like your new, kickass pet.
Apparently, there are absolutely no qualifications needed to start screwin' with the very foundation of an entire species, and the chief motivator for many selective breeders is 'I thought it would be funny.'
It's paradoxical that there are some species out there that we just can't exterminate, and not for want of trying. These creatures breed out of control and march steadily forth, taking human territory miles at a time.
People with a fear of flying often cite the sense of helplessness as one of the most terrifying aspects of the phobia. And, well, sometimes it's hard to disagree with them.
Millions of us are so terrified of or disinterested in having kids that we'll literally never do it. But the world's population keeps inflating like a balloon because there are plenty of people at the opposite end of that spectrum. Way, way at the opposite end.
Let's face it, we all hate nature to varying degrees and for our own reasons. But surely nothing inspires loathing of the animal kingdom like the fact that its creatures are constantly trying to trick us.
It's one thing for a judge to be corrupt -- we sort of expect that to happen in all public jobs, because we watch the news. It's quite another for judges to be hilarious lunatics, criminally lazy schemers or just impossibly evil.
Ah, the holidays: A time to give thanks, spend time with family, eat good food, light your neighbors on fire, rub engine oil in grandma's eyes, get drunk, fight a bull and dress up in a white tuxedo to ward off the furious ghosts of fish.
In order for insurance scams to work, you have to successfully trick countless investigators, police detectives, doctors and sometimes your friends and family. Which is another way of saying that most people fail hilariously.
Disney movies make hanging out with wild animals look fun. In the real world, there's a lot more screaming and soiling of oneself. These people are attempting the Disney route.
