Let me introduce you to the children I keep in the basement:
http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/the-6-least-intimidating-military-logos-ever/
http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/5-hilariously-inept-attempts-to-use-props-in-congress/
It's fascinating to trace the origins of everyday phrases back and find out just how many of them were not only slang, but terms that referenced unspeakable horror.
It turns out that a lot of the stuff that defines the modern battlefield has been around in some form for a lot longer than we think, thanks to murderous geniuses who were decades or centuries ahead of their time.
It turns out some scientists not only have a sense of humor, but can be sassy little shits if you give them half a chance ... even if it means damaging their own careers or entire scientific fields in the process.
If we just hadn't forgotten about all of these lesser-known, yet way crazier versions of huge news stories, maybe we could have avoided some of the tragedy.
No matter what metaphor you use to describe the United States' heterogeneous origins, there are nonetheless those facets of American culture that are widely regarded as uniquely (and sacredly) American. Well, guess what? They came from everywhere else.
Military insignia is supposed to be badass and intimidating, but every so often somebody in the armed forces graphic design department apparently catches brain fever brought on by mercury poisoning.