12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

There are too many of them. What are we going to do?
12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

These bits of trivia are precocious, propitious and packed full of potential! Also, harmless and nearly defenseless. Not that that should matter; just thought it was worth mentioning. 

Anywho, these are some truly impressive trivia tidbits, and we’ve got a lot riding on these puppies! Oh hey, can you watch them for us while we fight off these Clone Troopers real quick? Thanks!

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A Guy Robbed Two Banks in One Week by Pretending an Avocado Was a Grenade

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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He painted an avocado black, and handed the tellers a misspelled note threatening to detonate his fruit, ultimately making about $8,300 in five days. Despite his clever disguise of a hat and an eyepatch, police were able to track him down via cell phone data.

The Serial Fraudster Who Just Wanted Birthday Presents

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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A 39-year-old in Japan was arrested on charges of fraud because he maintained 35 different relationships with 35 different women, giving each one a different false birthday. He was able to wrangle about $800k in cash and gifts with his scheme before they caught on and reported him to police.

Russian Lawyers Said Dobby Looked Too Much Like Putin

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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In 2003, a Russian newspaper reported that a group of lawyers planned to sue Warner Bros., claiming that Dobby from Harry Potter was based on Vladimir Putin.

Crewmembers Hated Admiral Ackbar

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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He was originally a more normal-ish humanoid guy, but George Lucas asked director Richard Marquand to pick from a collection of more bizarre character designs. As they went ahead with this slimy fish-man, people working on the film thought he was way too ugly and goofy to be a good guy. But Marquand insisted that he wanted to send the message to kids that “good people aren’t necessarily good-looking people and that bad people aren’t necessarily ugly people.”

Carrie Fisher Threatened a Hollywood Producer With a Cow Tongue

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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After a friend of hers revealed that this mystery producer had attempted to sexually assault her, Fisher hand-delivered him a Tiffany’s box with a cow tongue inside, and a note that read, “The next delivery will be something of yours in a much smaller box!”

The Drug-Trafficking Parrot Who Refused to Snitch

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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A gang of Brazilian criminals trained a parrot to start yelling “Mum, the police!” if he noticed or suspected police coming near. The parrot was taken into custody when their compound was raided, and a journalist who visited it said, “So far it hasn’t made a sound… completely silent.”

The Microwave Was Originally a Cog in a Weapon of War

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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The magnetron was a device that created microwaves for radar systems created by Raytheon in World War II. When the war was over, engineers were tasked with finding less pugilistic uses for the technology. Engineer Percy Spencer noticed that a chocolate bar in his pocket melted while he was next to the magnetron, and he ultimately figured out how to recreate and localize the phenomenon.

Nineteenth-Century Sexists Thought Women’s Bodies Were Too Delicate for Trains

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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A moral panic ensued as locomotive travel became a reality in America. At one point, people asserted that women just didn’t have what it took to ride a train, making claims that “women’s bodies were not designed to go at 50 miles an hour.” It was feared that their wandering uteruses might fly out of them, or their bodies might disintegrate altogether.

Steve Harvey Rubbed His Success in His 6th Grade Teacher’s Face, Every Year, Until She Died

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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When he wrote for a school assignment that he wanted to be on TV, Harvey says his teacher made fun of him, possibly because he had a major stutter at the time. Then, he became famous as hell. He says, “Every year when the teacher was living, I used to send her a TV for Christmas, ‘cause I wanted her to see me.”

From an Environmental Standpoint, Every Whale Is Worth $2 Million

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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Whales are essentially gigantic filters, absorbing over 30 tons of carbon over their lifetimes, and depositing it safely on the ocean floor. The work done by each individual whale to reduce our global carbon footprint has been estimated at about $2 million.

Michael Jordan Was Too Short for Adidas

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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Before he settled on Nike, Jordan wanted a sponsorship with Adidas. Despite worldwide distributors begging them to sign the guy, Adidas HQ in Germany insisted that they would only sponsor big boys like Kareem Abdul-Jabbar.

What Would Even Wealth Distribution Actually Look Like?

12 Young, Force-Sensitive Bits of Trivia We’ve Entrusted to the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, Where We’re Sure They’ll Be Safe

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As of 2021, the world’s wealth was estimated by consulting firm Boston Consulting Group to be $431 trillion. Divided evenly among that year’s population of 7.888 billion, that comes out to just under $54,640 per person. In reality, a full quarter of global wealth is controlled by millionaires and billionaires.

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