What's Really Delaying Spielberg's Tin Tin Movie? Racism
Chaz Blazer, elite Hollywood agent and part-time sex addict, violently kicked open the office door. The single most powerful producer on the west coast, Geoff Chaser, stood inside, waiting for his friend's arrival. Caught off guard, he jumped at the noise of the door slamming open, turned, and began clawing desperately at the far wall. He was halfway to the ceiling before Chaz cried out.
"Geoff! Jesus, calm down! It's just me: Chaz Blazer, elite Hollywood agent and reigning Eastside Bi-racial Parkour Champion."Geoff looked down at him with bulging eyes. Slowly, he forced them closed, and willed his bloody fingers to retract from the drywall. He fell to the ground, and rolled on his side, panting. Then he rose so abruptly it looked as if reality had skipped a few frames. "CHAZ," he screamed, then softer, "Chaz. Baby. Sugar. Whore King and Conqueror of Babylon - how it do?""It do," Chaz conceded."I'm going to lay some serious shit on you, comrade, and baby I need you to roll with it. Can you roll, Chaz?" Geoff's speech patterns came in rapid waves, punctuated by long, swelling pauses. His cadence was that of an angry Mexican doing a Captain Kirk impression.You can buy Robert's book, Everything is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead, or follow him on Twitter and Facebook and no, those comic panels are not Photoshopped. That's all Unmodified, Grade-A, Original Racism on display up there.