Marriage, Anyone? It Took Me 5 Minutes to Become a Minister
As a recently married man, I support Proposition 8: I don’t want the sanctity of marriage sullied by queers, pedophiles, robosexuals and Californians. I simply will not stand by and watch the solemn, noble, sacred covenant of marriage be taken anything less than completely seriously. I take it so seriously, in fact, that I’ve recently undergone the painstaking (and again, totally sacred) process of becoming an ordained minister. No, seriously: That’s for real. I’ve completed my ordainment, and can now legally officiate a marriage that will be recognized in all fifty states. As you might expect, it was a long and arduous task involving years of study, strict spiritual discipline, studious reflection on the nature of man, and hopping across a series of crumbling pillars without spilling a glass of water to retrieve the precious Ajanti Dagger.here, filled out some basic information and verified an email address. For those of you that didn’t visit that link, here’s a picture of the form.
You can buy Robert's book, Everything is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead, or find him on Twitter, Facebook and his own site, I Fight Robots or you can just wait for next week's installment of how-to guides on destroying sacred institutions: The Path to Adoption (Through Arson).