These Are All The Foods That Share An Ingredient With Sunscreen

What’s that familiar, intriguing flavor?
These Are All The Foods That Share An Ingredient With Sunscreen

Sunscreen isnt a particularly appetizing soup. Despite the insistence of some brands on making theirs smell like some sort of robot banana, nobodys cracked open a bottle of SPF 50 and heard their stomach growl. Also, unlike other things that we assume taste bad, unless you apply it with the precision of a NASA satellite launch, you probably do know for a fact its disgusting. Unless you want a ring of fire around your mouth that looks like you French-kissed a hot pipe, youre going to get some in your mouth at some point, and understandably sputter.

It would seem, based on that criteria, that food would do its best to share as few ingredients as possible with sunscreen. Theres no need, what with the inside of your body, barring a much bigger problem, being famously dark. Yet, there is one ingredient in sunscreen that rears its head in a shocking amount of common foods: titanium dioxide. 

Before you point fingers, lets establish that this isnt just a base misunderstanding of how chemistry works, like one of those pranks where you scare people by telling them they're ingesting dihydrogen monoxide. Titanium dioxide is questionable enough in terms of food safety to have been banned altogether in the EU. Even worse, its not something helpful or necessary, like an effective preservative. Its just a colorant that gives food a delightfully bright white tinge. As such, its referred to plainly as a “food whitener,” which feels plucked straight from cyberpunk dystopia.

Of course, as you might guess, here in the U.S., they couldnt give half a shit about how much titanium were ingesting. While Petco has banned it in pet food, the FDA gives it a big thumbs-up on the human side. In fact, it’s so prevalent in what we put in our stomachs that I will not, as promised in the title, list all the foods it appears in, mainly because nobodys making it through a listicle with more than 3,000 entries.

But here at least is a starting point for all the ways you're chugging titanium

Skittles

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You cant get colors this bright without a nice primer coat of titanium.

Salad Dressing

Pixabay

The tongs arent the only metal in that salad!

Chewing Gum

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Well, this makes me feel way cooler while chewing gum.

Ice Cream

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Of course! Because theres no justice in this world.

Frozen Pizza

Pixabay

A risk Im willing to take for the worst version of pizza.

Cottage Cheese

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This is fine with me.

Coffee Creamer

Pixabay

You dont even like coffee, you just like the taste of titanium dioxide!

Little Debbie Pastries

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Okay, I mean, I knew there were chemicals in this.

Jell-O

Pixabay

The 1970s in absolute shambles.

Beyond Meat Plant-Based “Chicken” Tenders

Pixabay

Turns out youre not getting enough iron, but plenty of titanium.

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