13 Great Dark Humor Jokes About Capitalism

13 Gianmarco Soresi on Jeff Bezos’ ‘Charity’

“I was inspired because I saw that Jeff Bezos donated $25 million to help the homeless. Which I guess sounds generous, but I did the math. It turns out that $25 million is .028 percent of his net worth. Let me tell you something: donating .028 percent of my net worth is like if I went up to a homeless guy and stole a dollar.”

12 Sam Jay Wants to Enjoy Capitalism

11 ‘Robot Chicken’s Bitcoin ‘Matrix’

The folks at Robot Chicken break down how Bitcoin not only isn’t real but also how money itself is a construct using the best method possible: a Matrix parody.

10 The Streaming War

On Comedy Central’s Corporate, the capitalistic streaming wars brought begging, pain, humiliation and a quest for the rights of Gilmore Girls.

9 ‘American Dad’ Believes Capitalism Loves You

Sometimes, you have to look at yourself in the mirror and realize that your parenting was the problem, not capitalism. Hell, capitalism will help you win that rocket contest!

8 Trevor Noah and Neal Brennan Discuss How Rich Capitalists Caused Socialism’s Popularity

On The Daily Show, Brennan discussed how the richest rich people created a culture that caused the masses to side with socialism because of the unhinged behavior of the wealthy.

7 ‘Saturday Night Live’ Explores Wall Street

When the market is down, everyone gets desperate. If only Future Man would tell us how to prepare!

6 Brennan Lee Mulligan Explains Capitalism in Board-Game Terms

5 Joker’s Speech in ‘Harley Quinn’

“Gentlemen, my fellow whites, let’s raise a glass to this pyramid of money. The foundation of which was built upon our favorite pastime: Fucking the poor!”

4 ‘The Simpsons’ Explain the Death of Middle Class Through Song

3 Key & Peele Exploring How Capitalism ‘Fights’ Terrorism

Occasionally, the ability to make good profit margins offsets the zeal for your cause. It also causes competition and dissension in the same breath.

2 Lewis Black on How Capitalism Came from God

Lewis Black goes into how our leaders believe that unregulated capitalism creates a great Garden of Eden for all of us to share until, inevitably, the “river of shit” will rise.

1 George Carlin’s Definition of Capitalism

“The upper class keeps all of the money; pays none of the taxes. The middle class pays all of the taxes; does all of the work. The poor are there just to scare the middle class; keep them showing up at those ‘jobs!’”