Howard Stern Needs a Hug from a Knick, Proving His Relevancy Retired Long Ago

‘I’d like to think it’s a white thing, not my personality’
Howard Stern Needs a Hug from a Knick, Proving His Relevancy Retired Long Ago

Seriously, Howard? The Sirius XM host probably still deserves the title of “shock jock,” but only because we’re continually staggered by how out-of-touch Howard Stern continues to prove himself to be. The most recent idiocy? Bawling about how New York Knicks players aren’t coming over to talk to him when he’s sitting courtside. Specifically, how the Black players aren’t seeking him out for pre-game pleasantries. Sigh.

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“Black players won’t come over and say hello to me,” Stern complained this week on The Howard Stern Show. For some reason, Stern believes the players would rather talk to Spike Lee or Chris Rock.

Stern, historically proud of his ignorance about the NBA and other professional sports, does enjoy the notoriety that comes with courtside seats. The Knicks hand over the $7,000 tickets for free, but Stern still doesn’t feel like he’s getting his money’s worth. “A lot of times when I’m there, I’m next to Tracy Morgan, who is so funny. And he’s sitting there and a couple of the players will come over,” Stern ranted. “They give him that bro shake and stuff. And I’m like — these guys should hug me too.”

We’re not sure why Stern believes Julius Randle owes him a hug, other than he’s a celebrity. But as always, Stern thinks he has authority to air his racial grievances because Black kids went to his high school.  “I mean, what am I? I grew up in a Black neighborhood (Roosevelt in Long Island), you know what I mean? I mean they should know that. But I get ignored.”

New York Knicks players, most of whom were born in 1995 or later, “should know” that Stern attended a predominantly Black high school in 1968? Got it. 

As always, Robin Quivers was incredulous at the mistreatment of her boss. “They don’t acknowledge you at all?” she marveled. Surely Jalen Brunson understands that Stern took WXRK to number one back in 1994, kicking Imus’ ass in the process. “You think it’s a racial thing? I’m sure they talk to some white people,” Quivers continued. 

“No, not that I saw,” Stern insisted. “I want them to come up and go, ‘Hey Howard, fan of the show or something.’ … I just get upset. Fame to me is very important. I’ll admit it. I like people to recognize me.”

Coming from just about anyone else, Stern’s comments would inspire online outrage, but instead, he continues to be treated like everyone’s doddering uncle, the one who used to be in a cool band but no one can remember its name. 

Instead of calling for his head, Twitter users are more likely to point out the obvious:

Stern just can’t figure out why 22-year-olds aren’t rushing to kiss his ring. The answer is simple: His radio show peaked before he ever got to Sirius XM, and no amount of Ameria’s Got Talent judging is going to return him to the center of pop culture. Aging gracefully and accepting his emeritus status is an option, but not one Stern is interested in exploring. In his brain, there can only be one explanation for a Knicks player not asking for an embrace: “I’d like to think it’s a white thing, not my personality.” 

Hey, Howard? It’s your personality.

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