Winners and Losers from Last Night’s ‘Saturday Night Live’ With Michael B. Jordan

The contender tries to win the heavyweight comedy belt
Winners and Losers from Last Night’s ‘Saturday Night Live’ With Michael B. Jordan

Michael B. Jordan bobbed and weaved his way through Saturday Night Live’s second new show of 2023, not exactly scoring a knockout but ultimately raising his gloves in victory after 15 tough rounds of comedy. In addition to Jordan, there were plenty of other winners and losers from this week’s episode. Let’s go to the judges’ scorecard…

Winner: The Makers of ‘Watch Ya Mouth’

The popular board game that invites families to share spit-soaked dental cheek retractors got an inadvertent shout-out from “Roller Coaster Accident.” The mostly funny sketch answers the question, “What body part can Sarah Squirm distort next?” It also solves another riddle: “How many minutes can gross-out mouth openers be funny?” The answer: “Not quite five-and-a-half minutes.”

Loser: The ‘Damn, the Host Is Hot!’ Trope

Well, we haven’t seen this one in a while. Back in the Chris Kattan days, SNL often trotted out attractive young actresses for their host monologues, only to subject them to cringey male cast members “taking their shot.” Remember this one with Sarah Michelle Gellar looking like she wanted to slink away and hide under the stage?

We got the gender-switched version last night and it wasn’t much better. At least Michael B. Jordan looks like he’s having fun (as he did all night).

Winner: Jake from State Farm

Just what the hell is Jake from State Farm doing in everyone’s kitchens? One of the best sketches of the night wonders the same thing.

Loser: Any Musical Guest Who Had to Follow the Sam Smith Weirdness

There was nothing wrong with Lil Baby’s performances Saturday night. He just didn’t do this:

Broadway Video

Just before the ice-pick comes out in Basic Instinct 3.

Winner: Boxers’ Girlfriends

It’s been a minute since we’ve seen Every Boxer’s Girlfriend From Every Boxing Movie Ever. What better time to bring her back than when Adonis Creed is in the house? Creed knows what we’ve known all along — it’s time for Angel to leave Tommy and take the kids over to her sister’s. 

Loser: Commercial Parodies

Commercial parodies are an SNL staple, and normally we’re here for them. Or rather, we’re here for one of them. But in addition to Jake from State Farm’s comedy haymaker, we get two more — a Southwest Airlines ad full of obvious jokes (we’re not very good!), and two human mustaches shouting about King Brothers’ Toyota Overstock Sale-A-Thon. Are the writers still hungover from the Aubrey Plaza after-party?

Winner: The Unlikely Friendship of Michael B. Jordan and Andrew Dismukes

We could have imagined several SNL comics forming a mighty comedy duo with Michael B. Jordan, but it might have taken a minute before we got to Andrew Dismukes. Nonetheless, the two had funny chemistry all night long, from a video game director teaching a voice actor to fake-fight, to a nerdy alpha-male instructor getting schooled, to this last-sketch-of-the-night gem that features the new best friends flying off into the Manhattan night.

Loser: Those Paul Giamatti Verizon Commercials with Cecily Strong

We just want better for both of them.

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