Another week, another set of jokes told by the finest stand up comedians in all the land. Cracked Pro Tip: Grab a friend and read the entire article line by line, switching off after each word. For a real challenge, try doing it while wrestling one another. Check out last week's entry here.

Bob Monkhouse

"They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian ... They're not laughing now."

Andy Kaufman

Andy Kaufman[

Broadway Video

“Okay, now be quiet, I will pay $1000 to any woman that will beat me in this ring. I will not only do that, I will shave my head completely bald if I am beaten here. And any woman that will beat me has an extra prize she will get to marry me. Right here. She will take my hand in marriage. I will offer my hand in marriage if she beats me right here.”

Mike Birbiglia

Mike Birbiglia

Netflix

“Technology's moving so fast, man. It's to the point where you can make stuff up, and people will believe you. You can be like, 'You seen the new Sony Teleporter?' People will be like, 'No, but I heard about it.' I end up saying that all the time -- 'No, but I heard about it.' It means I haven't heard about it, but I like you.”

Russell Brand

Russell Brand

Netflix

“How long is it polite to pretend to continue to listen to someone after they've revealed they've got a boyfriend?

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Top Image: Netflix

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