Jokes are the lifeblood of comedy, whether they're over-arching, dry, lame, punny, ironic, low-hanging, irreverent, topical, edgy, safe, or alternative, we wouldn't have comedy without them. Here are 15 jokes that we salute for daring to challenge the very principals we've constructed about life and psychology, and some for being funny jokes about d*cks.

Demetri Martin

Demetri Martin

Comedy Central

"I was on the street. This guy waved to me, and he came up to me and said, 'I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else.' And I said, 'I am.'"

Eric Morecambe 

“I always take my wife morning tea in my pajamas. But is she grateful? No, she says she’d rather have it in a cup.”

David Spade

“I want to get away from it all. Move to the sticks. Montana. Hundreds of miles from civilization. Get a cabin in the snow. Curl up with some cute girl. Say stuff to her like, ‘Scream all you want, sugar. Ain’t nobody gonna hear you!’”

Wanda Sykes

“We got a black president. Not only can I dance, I can tap dance. You know what dignified black people hate? Tap dancing. Hate that shit. Like, “look at that damn Bojangles just setting us back. How we gonna get ahead she up there looking like Bojangles?” Now I can dance. I can do some other sh*t. I can buy whole watermelons now. I no longer have to grow them in my closet under my weed lamp.”

Charlie Murphy

Charlie Murphy

Comedy Central

"Hurricane Sandy left me without power for five days, I was not prepared to not have power for five days. F*****g five days is long enough for your kids to start second-guessing your authority. Three days in my son walks up to me and says, 'Why we gotta listen to you, you can’t even get the lights on?' I was like, 'Wow, this little boy has a point!'"

Chelsea Peretti

Chelsea Peretti tells the audience all the reasons why she wishes she was a guy.

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Top Image: Netflix


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