A suspicious technical difficulty has been brought to the attention of the Federal Trade Commission. A long time frustration of McDonald lovers everywhere, the ice cream machines that always seem to be broken have piqued the interest of the feds, who'd like to know what's really going on. 

McDonald's

"Put the McFlurry in the bag before I get McFurious."

According to The Independent, 60% of the dessert sales at McDonald's rely on these machines ... um ... working. As they are notorious for their high maintenance, owners working in this fast food joint have noted that a four-hour-long process must take place for them to complete their heat-cleaning cycle, typically overnight. Yes, this breaks down bacteria, but if the machine decides to go down with it, technicians must be called in to handle repairs. And voilá, your Shamrock Shake McCraving to the McCurb

It also comes down to simplicity, as Boston.com and the WSJ suggest. "There are a couple reasons behind this phenomenon, though only one has the FTC interested. As these ice cream makers are "so over-engineered it is silly. Sometimes simple is just better." Making ice cream in a bag might be a better option at this point if we're talking real simple. (Don't act like you're too good to scoop handfuls of bagged Oreo soft serve in your mouth.) As most of the machines are only manufactured by Taylor Commercial Foodservice LLC, which doesn't exactly make it easy for an employee to try their hand at fixing it. (It is rumored that legally, employees doing so is forbidden.)

McDonald's

McDonald's Malaysia has Sea Salt McFlurries, while McDonald's America only has customers/employees' salty tears.

But what can you do if you find yourself in this pickle? Well, a website exists if you're determined to find a path around this problem: McBroken.com. Created by software engineer Rashiq Zahid, it's intended to keep consumers in the know of where sundaes, milkshakes, and of course the McFlurry can be found when some locations' ice cream machines aren't working. 

To add to the drama of it all, the National Owners Association is "tired of being the butt of late-night jokes. So are our customers and crews." Because apparently, these broken ice cream machines are the number one thing giving McDonald's a bad reputation. Never mind the countless other mishaps, right?

For more of Oona’s sarcasm and attempted wit, visit her website oonaoffthecuff.com.

Top Image: McDonald's    

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