This piece was written by the Cracked Shop to tell you about products that are being sold there.
Black Friday ain't what it used to be. Literally. We live in a competitive, insanely commercial world in which companies constantly undercut one another to let a few foaming, holiday-crazed shoppers into their sales before Thanksgiving. Sometimes, way before Thanksgiving. Like, two and a half weeks before -- specifically, November 12. Do you see what's happening here? You can get an additional 15% off these deals with code SAVE15NOV (expires 11/17), so get your holiday-crazed foaming done now!
Sale Price: $19.99
Stuff these first-class macro lenses in your pocket to take great macro (i.e., super close up) photographs everywhere! Really lay your subjects bare by getting all up in there, even the gross stuff.
Chances are, none of your friends have had a good blowout since March, so tuck this salon-quality hair dryer into their stocking. With three speed settings, a concentrator, and a diffuser, they'll shed tears of gratitude (and not split ends) no matter their hair type.
Sale Price: $99
Even an idiot can fly this drone (which might describe somebody on your gift list)! It offers an unprecedented level of control and stability, with four high-speed propellers and a six-axis gyro. It also has an HD camera, so your Gen Z siblings can have hours of fun following around some random squirrel. Those kids are weird.
This evolution of the slingshot shoots actual friggin' arrows at up to 350 FPS. It's literally a hunting tool if you put sharpened arrows in it and just a really strong slingshot if you don't, so definitely think long and hard about who you give it to.
Get an unreal deal on Apple's collaboration with Beats by Dre. These wired headphones deliver impeccable sound via Bluetooth streaming while still remaining secure around your neck, so there's no chance of losing them down a storm drain and risking encounters with murderous clowns (or just, you know, losing them down a storm drain).
Getting old is hard, and now they're telling us that we still have to work out? Such an injustice. This percussion massager can help, though. With an AI chip, it actually senses your muscles to give them the exact treatment they need every time you use it.
The TaoTronics are an Amazon's Choice Product with a 30-hour battery life and three modes to complement any listening environment. With a Sony digital noise-cancellation chip, these headphones will block out all the noise anyone on your gift list would like to block out. (Probably you. Don't take it personal.)
This five-piece, nonstick set comes with a pie pan, a grill pan, a skillet, and a dutch oven to facilitate all kinds of kitchen creativity. Give it to the MasterChef lover in your life and prepare to reap the benefits.
Give the gift of music without making lifelong enemies of everyone else in the house. With nine silicone drum pads, this electric set is headphone-friendly (but also has a built-in stereo speaker) so you can practice the drums without making "all that racket." It also has nine volume and 15 speed levels for more flexible operation.
Take movie night literally anywhere with this pocket-sized, 1080p HD projector that's about as light as an iPhone 7s Plus. It casts a 200" cinema-quality image onto any surface in 200 lumens so you can see the screen in any lighting. You can also access the Google Play Store to download apps and stream directly from Prima. It's like having your own private pop-up movie theater, which is probably the only kind of movie theater you'll get for a while.