In 'Death Stranding,' A Baby Talks Through Your Controller

If someone told me years ago that in the future, there would be a game by legendary Metal Gear director Hideo Kojima wherein a baby would verbally communicate with a player through a talking controller -- which is actually happening -- I would've said, "Yes, of course that's a thing. It fits perfectly in line with the progression of Kojima's penchant for dragging the goddamn game itself into the real world. After all, in Metal Gear Solid, to beat Psycho Mantis, you had to physically move the PS1's memory card from one port to another."

Finally, childless gamers can get the crying babies they've always wanted!Hideo Kojima/TwitterFinally, childless gamers can get the crying babies they've always wanted!

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And if you were to ask me a follow-up question about what types of actions the player would need to perform to trigger a response from the baby, I probably would've guessed correctly, "Oh, I don't know, maybe rocking the controller, mimicking the gentle swaying that puts babies to sleep?"

And finally, if I were given the opportunity to ask questions in return, I would ask, "Has Kojima been committed to an asylum yet? Have the bodies of those he has slain been discovered? Has his reign of madness ended? Will the world finally know peace?" The answer, thankfully, would be no.

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Luis can be found on Twitter and Facebook. Check out his regular contributions to Macaulay Culkin's BunnyEars.com. And listen for his "Meditation Minute" segments on the Bunny Ears podcast.

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