5

DayZ Players Face The Ol' Die Hard Gambit

There are three ways to play post-apocalyptic survival game DayZ: by yourself, with friends, or by trying to cooperate with strangers ... and immediately being killed by them. The real challenge in this game is maintaining your faith in humanity. That's why YouTube user Cyborg Lizard decided to run a little social experiment.

4

An EVE Online Player Enacts A Years-Long Revenge Scheme

The first time you go online in a video game is a magical moment. The moments right after that, when you are repeatedly butchered by some high-level dick? Not so much. For EVE Online player Darvo Thellere, that a*****e was named Kackpappe, and his stated goal was to "ruin [his] game experience and harass [him] until [he] stops playing."

Kackpappe relentlessly fucked with Darvo for months, until he got bored and moved on to messing with some other newbies. But Darvo didn't quit the game. He kept playing, getting better and better and creating a nice network of space buddies. And then, four years later, he noticed the name of another user looking for a crew: "Kackpappe."

dict.ccTranslation checks out.

Turns out Kackpappe had recently been kicked out of another group, and his former leader was desperate to kill him (sounds like a real charmer). After changing his name in case he got recognized, Darvo kindly offered his former tormentor a spot in his current group. Why, he even negotiated with Kackpappe's old crew so they'd let him gather all his stuff and safely take it out of their turf! And then, once Kackpappe teleported to meet up with his new buddies, Darvo changed his name back. Over the team chat, Kackpappe just said, "Argh f**k, Darvo Thellere."

3

The Counter-Strike Hacks Specifically Designed To Get Cheaters Banned

Counter-Strike: Global Offensive is a game that many people take very seriously -- though some not seriously enough to, you know, get better at it. Instead, they've created a massive market for cheats that offer instant competitive dominance. They can give you infinite ammo, infinite health, the ability to see enemies behind walls ... or all those things and more at the same time. They implement these cheats over and over, which is like carrying a big sign that says "PLEASE BAN ME."

And that's exactly what a hack created by Reddit user AndroidL was designed to do. Inspired by another player who got 300 hackers banned with a similar scheme, AndroidL put together an irresistible cocktail of "multi-hacks" and posted it on a popular cheaters' den. His first two releases seemed to work normally at first, but at a specific time, they would start altering every variable of the game to the point where it would leave the anti-cheating system no option but to ban the players. The best one changed the viewing angle to a perspective as crooked as their souls.

Valve CorporationValve has already started selling this hack as Walking Home Drunk Simulator.

2

Elite: Dangerous Trolls Messed With The Wrong Cancer Fundraiser

In early 2018, a group of Elite: Dangerous players organized an epic space expedition in honor of their friend Brandon Keith, aka DoveEnigma13, who had been fighting cancer for three years without much hope of getting better. The 20-day journey would also raise funds for a cancer charity, and DoveEnigma13 would be accompanied by his young daughter. Naturally, some people found out about this and said "Not in my simulated galaxy."

1

An Overwatch Player Destroys Cheaters

When Overwatch player Seagull noticed a cheater in his game, he decided to roll with it and see what happened. We should mention that Seagull is one of Overwatch's top pros ... and so were the five friends he happened to be playing with that day. The cheater in question was using an aimbot, meaning they could automatically target any player around them without any effort. It's like if the Terminator was a huge wuss. Things didn't look good for Seagull's team at first, until they started ignoring the other players to focus solely on obliterating the f**k out of the cheater. They won 3-0.