After failing to shoot him in the head, Jack instead knees Napoleon in the dick and calls him the N-word. Replace the N-word with "Toon," and it's pretty much the same movie as Who Framed Roger Rabbit?.
Soon after, Jack has a heart attack, and coincidentally at the same time, Napoleon is fatally shot (not by Jack). Of course, Denzel is an organ donor and his heart ends up in ... Jack. The hilarious situation of a black man dying and donating his heart to save Jack's life is commemorated by his friends putting a giant black dildo in his hospital bed.
New Line Cinema
New Line CinemaPictured: six dicks.
Jack freaks out -- not because his friends are such friggin' jackasses, but because the doctors put a black person's heart in his body. Then, in what is presumably a common side effect of this type of procedure, Jack starts being haunted by Napoleon's ghost. When Denzel isn't making jokes about being a ghost or how his dick is "as big as a Shetland Pony's," he helps Hoskins woo their mutual ex-girlfriend ... who also secretly had Denzel's baby.
Then a killer pimp kidnaps and almost murders the baby, so Denzel and Hoskins team up to take out the pimp while simultaneously fixing racism forever.
New Line Cinema
New Line Cinema"Of course! We had to kill a pimp who kidnapped the secret baby of a ghost. Why didn't we try this sooner?"
People have pointed out that for all of this movie's attempts to address racial tensions, it's incredibly racist -- like how despite being a lawyer, Denzel's character acts like a pimp, what with all the prostitute wrangling and crack possession. And in the end, his character is turned into an "absentee father" for essentially no reason. This movie is so bad that there was even a rumor that Washington canned his agent as a result. The worst part, though, might be the film's international title:
New Line Cinema"Well, he's also a father, how about-"
"You're fired too."
You (yes, you) should follow JM on Twitter, or check out the podcast Rewatchability.
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