Is it a very small house? Or maybe some sort of storage space? Like, for people? That's exactly how YouTuber QuietGaming tried to use the booth ... and it worked fairly well. Dangerously well, even, considering how useful these storage spaces can be for members of the mafia.

2K Games
Presumably, the river is already packed with corpses right up to the surface.

So, QuietGaming kept putting more and more dead people inside the booth, like a serial killer version of Doctor Who. Despite being packed beyond reason, the place held up surprisingly well, give or take the occasional corpse jitter.

2K Games
It's stinkier on the inside.

Naturally, this pointless exercise soon became a challenge of finding out how many people he could fit inside. The answer: a whole shitload.

2K Games
OK, mostly inside.

In the end, QuietGaming claims he was able to fit 100 dead policemen inside that damn phone booth (he could have probably gotten 1,000 had he opted for clowns). At this point, he did what any self-respecting criminal would do and blew his little art installation to pieces with explosives.

2K Games
"Someone call the ... oh. Ohh."

Many other YouTubers soon followed in QuietGaming's footsteps. Watch this one patiently place over 50 corpses inside a booth, make it go boom, and then throw about a dozen more bodies to the somehow still rectangle-shaped pile. (Although one was a minor, so maybe that was cheating?)

2K Games
Also, he apparently chopped off some of their heads to optimize space.

This other one confirmed that the phones are still usable in this state when a soon-to-be-dead witness tried to call the police in the booth/graveyard.

Meanwhile, your iPhone stops working if you drop it lightly on a table. They just don't make things like they used to.

Is the soldier you've decided to torture taking cover behind a jeep? Simply lift up the vehicle with another handy balloon, gently push the guy underneath it, and wait for the Wile E. Coyote-esque action once the other guards shoot the balloon down.

Konami Digital Entertainment
Was he standing on quicksand?

Of course, this is supposed to be a game of stealth. Ideally, you should make all deaths look like innocent accidents -- such as that common one where a jeep lands on you out of nowhere. All you need is explosives, more of these incredibly durable vehicles, and good ol' video game physics.

Konami Digital Entertainment
As stealthy as it gets.

Since the game gives you the chance to use all sorts of cool gadgets in order to overthrow the island's Castro knockoff, some players may end up deviating a bit from the objective. For instance, you can use your ropes to tie up enemies, turn them into a grappling hook ... or mix them with rocket science to fuck with other characters.

Square Enix
Rocket science, and some particularly potent chili.

But perhaps, torturing poor civilians who can barely resist is too much effort for you. In that case, how about some poor animals who don't even understand what the hell is happening? Behold, the island's famed Rocket Cow:

Square Enix
Probably not what Castro had in mind when he said he wanted to breed super cows.

You might even try to justify your sadistic tendencies by saying that it's all for the sake of scientific innovation. We present you an invention called the Cow-Rousel, which is pretty self-explanatory:

Square Enix
That's one way to make a milkshake, we guess.

When your reign of terror turns out to be even darker than the one originally supplied by the game, you may eventually decide to make things look more hopeful somehow. For example, creating an inverted Santa sleigh by hanging a bunch of cows from a plane:

Square Enix
Or it could be that afterburner seared steak is better than it sounds.

YouTube user found out that DayZ zombies are even dumber than the average chunk of decomposing flesh. It turns out you don't need to make any stealth plans or be heavily equipped to avoid them. All you have to do is drop to the ground and roll over. It's almost like the game started as a "what to do if you catch on fire" simulator but then the developers decided to move it to a more profitable genre.

Bohemia Interactive
With a brief stop at "Tumbleweed Sim" before finally arriving at zombies.

See, video game characters have things called "hitboxes," which are ... boxes that can be hit. Invisible ones superimposed on the characters' body parts. It just so happens that when you're moving on the ground, your hitboxes remain completely out of the zombies' hitting range, which looks like a rather frustrating experience for them. NomadGaming eventually let his zombie pursuers catch up to him, and that's when things got really sad:

Bohemia Interactive
Apparently, the flies get extra annoying when you're a zombie.

Perhaps taking pity on his brain-eating enemies, NomadGaming moved on to something that looks more fun for all parties involved. He found that if his character kept crawling ahead and the zombie kept running after catching up to him, the game's collision mechanics could bring the pair of them up to cruising speed.

Bohemia Interactive
"Just drop me off on the next corner, Z-Dog."

Unfortunately, the game also included soccer's least popular feature: The referee who would suspend your players if they were on the giving end of a maneuver like the one depicted above. Obviously, the presence of such a character in a game you bought to avoid the limitations of real life was something that had to be dealt with. It wasn't long until players found out they could avoid the referee by ... literally avoiding the referee.

EA Games
Someone has already dubbed in "Yakety Sax".

For some reason, the game only awards players with yellow or red cards if the referee manages to catch up to the perpetrator. So, after committing a foul, all a player has to do is run away from the pissed off guy in black for as long as they are willing to waste the time of the friend they are playing with.

EA Games
We like to believe there's still a referee out there, trying to catch the douchiest of midfielders after 23 years.

Note that, based on the various videos of this happening on YouTube, the game doesn't work by "tag" rules. The referee may touch you, but as long as you keep running, he still won't give you a card. You have to make a conscious decision to stop running in order to receive your punishment. So, yes, in theory, one could conceivably keep this up until the end of time.

EA Games
This game was 1994's leading cause of hand cramps after Kimberly from the Power Rangers.

Just make sure you enjoy the spectacle from a safe distance, lest you become part of it. And hey, if you stand far enough, you might even get to witness the landing up close!

Bethesda Softworks
"Hey baby, did it hurt when you ...? Dammit, it's another guy."

Oh, and in case you were wondering: Yes, it works on animals too.

Bethesda Softworks
This is actually how tiger rugs are manufactured.

When not trolling poor NPCs, Tiago Svn can be found trolling trolls on Twitter. Adam Koski wrote a fantasy book about fairies turning into monsters.

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