The detox industry is pretty big right now, so big that "detoxing" is recognized by our spellchecker, and that makes us very sad. It's not hard to convince people that their body is full of toxins. We spend all day inhaling automobile exhaust and stuffing garbage into our mouths; scientists have confirmed that human DNA is more closely related to Oscar The Grouch than chimpanzees. But according to more than one website, the problem is even worse than we thought: We should be detoxing not only ourselves but our kids.
You know how kids are, what with their irregular colons and weak adrenal glands.
One company, Dherbs, not to be confused with DERPS, has developed a liquid cleanse for children, to combat all of the horrible junk we're feeding our kids that's making them fat and ruining their sleep; it also improves their circulatory system and increases their concentration. And if you thought those claims were birdbrained, you should take a look at the Djehuty liquid cleanse, sold by DHealthStore.com (we're sensing a bit of a pattern here). This product claims to counteract the natural toxicity of most wombs, as well as the doctor-prescribed "harmful and poisonous pharmaceutical drugs" that are the "reason why so many babies are born with hepatitis and jaundice." Holy shit, how have we all managed to survive this long?