Or else crocodiles will just eat everything they see and even sharks don't stand a chance. You decide which worries you more.

Oh, wow, are those people, organizing for some sort of mass protest?

Andy Rouse/Rex Features

Nope: penguins. We tend to think only humans and maybe some insects organize in colonies so massive. But you're looking at a penguin metropolis. Or, if you prefer, the million-penguin march, in fact. This shot was taken by Andy Rouse in a passing helicopter, and it captures the king penguin colony of South Georgia. There, adults instinctively gather their brown-stain babies and huddle them together to keep them warm. Once the chicks are secure, the grown-ups go hunting for fish, more fish, and (if the kids are really good) fish for dessert.

Andy Rouse/Rex Features
Made with a mother's love ... and stomach bile.

Witnesses saw wings protruding above the water, because apparently those are tastiest and so are saved for last. The octopus got to the wings eventually, pulling the entire body under. Turns out an octopus' garden is not, in fact, where you want to be.

Ginger Morneau
What's next, Ringo? Are submarines not really yellow? Where do your lies end, Ringo?

Jack, the adorable little tabby you initially overlooked down there at the bottom of the picture, isn't just staring at a bear chilling in the trees -- he chased that bear up there. A territorial animal who never forgot his lion roots, Jack noticed the bear wandering in his backyard, hissed loudly, and charged. Remember, a cat's hiss is its poisonous-snake impression, and bears don't like poison any more than you do. So up the tree he went, cowering there until Jack apparently got bored and trotted away.

Figuring the coast was clear, the bear climbed back down ... only to have Jack spring seemingly from nowhere and give chase again. Up another tree the bear went, learning very quickly that just because the warden goes to lunch doesn't mean the prisoner's earned his freedom. Just to reiterate: Jack the cat wasn't bluffing that bear. He didn't suddenly realize he was technically food to this thing and leave -- he wanted a piece of that bear so bad that he pretended to leave and hid for an ambush.

We're so used to the roles of these animals being reversed that, at first, it seems like you're looking at the cover for Drag Me to Hell: Safari Edition. But no: you're really looking at a zebra straight jacking up that lion's Christmas. The lion initially jumped the zebra and clamped down on its neck, but rather than resigning itself to food status, Zebra Hulk dragged the lion to deep water and held that sucker underwater like a veldt hitman.

Discovery Channel
"Long live the king."

Eventually, the lion managed to break free, but it was too exhausted to pursue the zebra, which got away with only superficial wounds. The lion returned to its pride for a lifetime of mockery.

That looks like a real good day to be an elephant, and a real bad day to be a lizard. For the record, that's a real elephant whipping a real lizard around, much like we would whip our socks about and pretend they're nunchucks. There's no real story here; the elephant, named Madhuri, was grazing when she noticed a monitor lizard hanging around and figured things would be way more fun if the lizard was spinning about in terror. For days on end, she kept her living toy firmly in her trunk, subjecting it to impromptu pendulum rides, whether it wanted them or not (spoiler: it did not).

Jagdeep Rajput / Solent News
On the plus side, the lines for this ride are super short.

Sometimes, she would throw the lizard into the air and catch it like a demented Pizza Hut employee. Other times, she would let it drop to the ground, only to quickly pick it up again and continue the most whimsical torture session ever. When she finally got bored, she let the lizard stumble away with a story that the other lizards would never believe.

The normally noisy and hooty clan was unnaturally quiet and respectful, as the realization that a beloved member of their community had died slowly sank in. Some, like Jacky, the group's alpha male, figured it out quicker than others. While ordinarily calm and collected, Jacky completely lost it as they wheeled Dorothy away, screaming in grief until the others comforted him.

IDA Africa
Her adopted son, Bouboule, making the exact same face as you right now.

You've probably heard that ants are stupidly strong, but they can't be this strong. Somebody probably glued that poor ant's feet to that rock and managed to snap this picture right before all the legs popped off. But no, that ant is truly holding on to that rock with nothing but the tips of its ... whatever it has, while holding onto that branch with nothing but its mandibles. See, an ant's neck is connected straight to other load-bearing points in its body, allowing it to support all the weight the critter carries. That neck, when straightened out like seen above, can carry objects roughly 5,000 times heavier than the insect it's attached to. This raises a lot of questions, most important of which is: why doesn't Ant-Man have a world-destroying headbutt?

If you're not sitting in your chair worrying that there might be a spider near you right now, then you probably like spiders too much. We thought we'd remind you why you're wrong. See that picture above? Look closer: that's a lizard being devoured by the end boss of a video game. And it's 100 percent real. Here's proof:

The spider is a golden silk orb-weaver, which uses glycoproteins to build some of the strongest, stickiest webs around. It can capture and consume just about anything in those things -- lizards, birds, snakes ...

Michael Grainger
An aeroplane, and Lenny Bruce ...

If you're the type of person who enjoys recurring nightmares about one nightmare snacking on another nightmare, you have Australian photographer Michael Grainger to thank for that photo.

Whoa, those things are Australian? Who would have guessed? Get bent, Australia. If an Australian ever tells you it's not so bad living there, don't listen: that is a human skin suit filled with thousands of spiders, and it is trying to trick you.

Check out Yosomono's other image articles at Gaijinass.com.

For more images that can't be real but totally are, check out 18 Old-Timey Photos You Won't Believe Aren't Photoshopped. And then check out 13 Mind-Blowing Tricks Advertisers Use to Manipulate Photos.

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