Surely Blauvelt had the common sense to make sure "his" new bachelor pad belonged to, say, an eccentric billionaire who owns a hundred houses and never visits them?
Nope! His lovingly crafted lie lasted for one goddamn hour. The actual owner of the place bumped in while Blauvelt's in-laws were still arguing over bedrooms, gave them one look, and called the cops.
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But not before the squatters ate all the food and licked all the silverware.
Going from a rich, charitable mansion owner to a lying felon in one fell swoop is a big nut shot for anyone. However, Blauvelt's problems were just beginning: It turns out that the reason he assumed that his girlfriend would be impressed by a large-scale re-enactment of "playing house" was that she was still pretty much at an appropriate age. The cherry on this whole stupidity cake was that the lady of Blauvelt's dreams was only 15.
When the police turned up, Blauvelt's feet didn't touch the ground. He was arrested and charged with sexual misconduct and endangering the welfare of a child, along with many interesting burglary-related things. His girlfriend and her family faced no repercussions, because apparently there are no laws against being incredibly gullible.
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Even though that would be a remarkably effective way to stop 419 scammers.
Blauvelt may have lacked in expensive mansions and the common sense to stay the hell away from minors, but his pure, stupid tenacity was world championship material: Until the end, he tried to convince the police that he had inherited the place from his dead grandfather. You know, despite having broken in and being unable to provide any paperwork, and with the real owner of the place having called the cops in the first place.