Ms. Schuster and her daughter missed practice because they were helping Ms. Schuster's mother prepare for a missionary meeting.
Herbert Kipf decided that he needed to finish a letter before he went to practice. Because it's not like you can just pick up that kind of activity later, you know?
Joyce Black says that it was cold outside, so she delayed going for so long that she ended up being late. Cold weather in early March in Nebraska? A likely story, Joyce.
"The spirit of God warms me, but giving my car heater a head start helps, too."
Harvey Ahl and his two sons were late because he was talking to somebody and lost track of time. Talking to a person who makes you late for an appointment with God? Tell us, what does the devil talk about?
And finally, the reverend, who had lit the furnace earlier that day and then went home to dinner, ended up being late because his daughter made a mess in her dress, so he had to wait for his wife to iron a new one before they could all go.
Beatrice Daily Sun
"Darling, you can have as many pudding cups as you want when we get back home."
So the church explodes, while all of the people who are supposed to be inside are ironing dresses and working on homework. Considering that it was a church choir, the members pretty much agreed that it was a miracle. No matter how cynical you are, you have to admit, they have a point, though if they had seen Final Destination, they would probably all feel differently. Unsurprisingly, this story was fascinating enough to earn a spot on an episode of Unsolved Mysteries.
For people who looked death in the eye and flipped it the bird, check out 7 People Who Cheated Death (Then Kicked It In The Balls). Or learn about the 6 People Who Died In Order To Prove A (Retarded) Point.
And stop by LinkSTORM to see which columnist is Death incarnate.
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