Providing your kidnapper is incredibly lazy, unable to read or just doesn't really have his heart in this whole abduction thing, perhaps this device could provide some good. Maybe the authorities will use it to track you down at the mastermind's fortified compound or, more likely, find you dead in the trunk of your car where you accidentally trapped yourself while testing the device.
"I haven't tested its water resistance when I'm naked with a large rock tied to my feet."
And really, if it's surveillance we're talking about, you'd better go all the way ...
Hidden Cameras and Hidden Camera Detectors
Need to keep track of your personal space? Worried about microscopic particles in the air that probably have little to no effect on your overall health? If only paranoia and hypochondria could have a few drinks together and produce an unholy offspring to meet these dual needs. Oh wait, they did!
We're living in the paranoia renaissance, folks.
Want to know who's been stealing your paper clips? You could just walk over and grab another box from the supply closet, like a chump. Or you could shell out $700 like a boss and catch that bastard on camera. Using state of the art surveillance technology, this lovely motion-activated camera can forever put to rest the fears of someone rummaging through your cubicle or office.
Especially that one guy who just poses for hours over your three month performance review.
But now you have to fear that someone else may also have a hidden camera somewhere. Ah ha! But you have the hidden camera detector. This space age technology allows the owner to discover hidden cameras at work using lasers. How does it work? It works with lasers! What more do you need to know?
Wait, but what if their cameras are equipped with hidden camera detector detectors? So they can preemptively detect your detector and somehow cloak themselves? Someone must make a device to counteract such a thing. Come on, somebody! Build it before it's too late! Here's our money!
Benjamin Buso lives in Texas and is reasonably sure he is on several government watch lists after researching this article.
For more weapons that shouldn't exist, check out The 13 Most Irresponsible Self Defense Gadgets Money Can Buy. Or check out supplies we wish were real in 21 Office Supplies Too Awesome To Exist.