The Big Bang Theory
the pilot episode, cosmic gases come closer and closer together...as if
they are forming something. What could they be doing? Stay tuned for 21
more episodes to find out!
large Cuban-American family runs a sugar and rum business in Florida,
but it quickly becomes a drug business. In a shocking mid-season power
struggle, star Jimmy Smits tries to wrest power from his father by growing
a bigger mustache than him, but in a shocking twist, the matriarch of
her family seizes control when she reveals the size of her mustache, which
fills an entire Olympic-sized swimming pool.
this reality show, a group of 40 prepubescent kids take up residence in
a ghost town with no adults. Things take a sour turn when Piggy, the glasses-wearing
fat kid, is crushed by a falling piano. Soon after, everyone starves because
no one has a job.
private investigator...who is also a vampire! If this show succeeds, stay
tuned for several similar shows next year, like Werewolf Chef,
Frankenstein Nanny and Zombie Magistrate Court Judge.
mid-season replacement about 1970s era wife-swapping. So it's the premise
of any number of porn films without the nudity or graphic sex? Consider
cop show set in New Orleans (the "K" stands for "Katrina"). Hard-nosed
police officer Scads Kneecap and his partner Charles "Wrinkles" Relish
take the city back after years of it being run by rogue weather phenomena.
In the pilot, they take down a ring of tornadoes that have been beating
up hookers while digging deeper into a low pressure system that's been
spreading drugs all over town.
New York City homicide detective is actually a guy who was granted immortality
360 years ago. So, it's Highlander without the swords or the
Reckoning or Sean Connery or basically anything cool. Great.
Back To You
Grammer and the wife from Everybody Loves Raymond are a broadcast
news team in Pittsburgh...blah blah blah, I'm falling asleep just typing
you're at the breakfast nook, right? And all of the sudden, the red-hot
George Foreman grill is flying right at your face! And, what's this? The
refrigerator has turned into the ex-girlfriend who dumped you to marry
your douche of a brother! Ahhhhh! And then you wake up, and you're all
like, "That was fucked up."
The Search for the Next Great American Band
TV show, I've already found the next great American band. They're called
"Maneaters: A Tribute to Hall and Oates," and they will change the face
of rock forever.
is a reality show about attention-hungry people trying to make it in the
country music industry by whoring themselves American Idol-style,
but here they're wearing cowboy boots.
The Sarah Connor Chronicles
destroying the liquid metal Terminator from Terminator 2, Sarah
and John Connor move on with their lives, only to find out that the T-800
model has become governor of California. When the T-800 cannot get Democratic
state legislators to agree on a state budget plan, a deadlock threatens
to shut down important state services and programs! Can Sarah and John
kill the legislators to stop the deadlock and save the future?
The Return of Jezebel James
estranged sisters move in together when one agrees to carry another's
baby. How much do you want to bet they're totally different from one another?
And that they'll get into wild disagreements? Man, I can't wait for this
breath of fresh air on the airwaves!
Life is Wild
New York City family moves to the wilds of Africa. Luckily, there's a
Starbucks there, so they can get coffee and all the free wireless Internet
Aliens in America
regular American 16-year-old's life is turned completely upside-down when
an exchange student from Pakistan moves to town! From
the producers of Carl the Lovable Xenophobe and Saturday
Night Lynch Mob.
guy in his early twenties discovers his parents sold their souls to the
devil years ago and now has to go around the world doing Satan's dirty
work. Suburban goth kids everywhere will proclaim that the protagonist
is just like them before they have to put on their Polo
shirts so they can get in their shift at Borders.
very rich, very spoiled girl not unlike a certain heiress famous for flashing
her snatch to the world and not much else, discovers that money can't
buy everything. Clearly, the show is fiction, because the real world,
money clearly can do anything you want, like reduce your jail sentence
by half and remove you from the general prison population.
Thanks, justice system!
Matt needs to sleep for about two weeks after spending much longer than he intended on this piece. In the meantime, read his blog, the not-very-cleverly titled MW Blog .