14 TMI Celebrity Facts for the Hall of Yikes
Kanye West has 99 problems, and evidently one of them is that he really wants to have sex with all the rest of the Kardashians.
Keith Richards Snorted His Dad
When asked what the strangest thing he’s snarfled up his nose, he said, “My father. I snorted my father. He was cremated, and I couldn’t resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn’t have cared, he didn’t give a shit. It went down pretty well, and I’m still alive.”
Chad Kroeger Sucks
Kroeger once fellated himself on a dare: “I put my own dick in my mouth. I was 14 and much more flexible at the time. It was soft and required a lot of pulling. I really wanted that case of beer.” Avril Lavigne seems to corroborate the validity of the claim, saying he has the biggest dinghy she’s ever seen.
Steven Tyler’s Not a Step-Dad, He’s Just the Dad Who Stepped Up
He detailed his intimate relationship with a 16-year-old who “knew how to nasty” in his memoir, and explained how he was able to kidnap her: “Her parents fell in love with me, signed a paper over for me to have custody, so I wouldn’t get arrested if I took her out of state. I took her on tour with me.”
Paul McCartney Liked to Crank It With His Pals
He told a bizarre story about group masturbation with John Lennon and some of their buddies: “The lights were out, and somebody started masturbating, so we all did.” They took turns yelling out names of celebrities they were thinking about: “We were just, ‘Brigitte Bardot!’ ‘Whoo!’ And then everyone would thrash a bit more. I think it was John who said, ‘Winston Churchill!’”
Zoe Saldana Probably Did It on the Q
Aside from an airplane, she says the craziest place she’s ever had sex was on the subway: “Okay, this is ghetto, but hey, I’m from Queens, whatever. There is a train from Coney Island all the way back into the city, and in between two train cars. It was super ghetto.”
Orlando Bloom Will Manifest on Your Behalf
He said that his morning routine includes downing some “brain octane oil,” a “bit of Buddhism” and “dreaming about roles for myself and others, for minorities and women. I’m trying to be a voice for everybody.”
Angelina Jolie’s Bizarre First Time
She revealed in an interview that she spontaneously got really into bloodletting when she lost her virginity: “I had started having sex with my boyfriend, and the sex and the emotions didn’t feel enough. I was no longer a little girl. In a moment of wanting to feel closer to my boyfriend, I grabbed a knife and cut him. He cut me back. We had an exchange of something and we were covered in blood, my heart was racing.”
Kanye West Wrote About Lusting After Kim K’s Sisters
In his song “XTCY,” he says he fantasizes about the entire Kardashian hive: “You got sick thoughts? I got more of ‘em. You got a sister-in-law you would smash? I got four of ‘em.”
Pete Davidson’s Non-Newtonian Dong
After Ariana Grande announced that he’s got a 10-inch dangler, he — tragically — elaborated: “I'm not really a grower or a shower. It’s actually the same small and hard. It’s actually a scientific wonder.”
At a Certain Point, Sia Could Have Just Chosen Not to Make Her Little Movie
She wrote and directed a movie about a nonverbal autistic girl, and cast the neurotypical Maddie Ziegler in neurodivergent-face. But not for lack of trying! She said she “actually tried working with a beautiful young girl, nonverbal on the spectrum, and she found it unpleasant and stressful.” When an actor with autism told her she had an issue with the casting, Sia said “Maybe you're just a bad actor.”
Will Smith Went Hyena Mode
He said he “went full ghetto hyena” after a breakup, and had sex that “was so constitutionally disagreeable to the core of my being that I developed a psychosomatic reaction to having an orgasm.” In other words, he’d puke when he’d finish. Just like the noble hyena?
That’s What You Get for Having Sex With Charlie Puth
He called time-out during sex so he could write a song: “Maybe I should have focused on the act a little bit more, but the melody just kind of popped into my head and I actually had stopped and recorded a little quick voice note and then had to get back into the act.”
Cameron Diaz Is Some Kind of Inverse Sex Tourist
Few stars are as willing to itemize their abysmal carbon footprints as Diaz: “Oh gosh, I can’t even count how many times I’ve gotten on a plane for love. It’s not unusual in this business; my lifestyle demands it. I’m always traveling for cock. You’ve got to go where it is.”
Kevin Gates Pulled a Joe Dirt
He slept with his cousin, both before and after finding out they were related. After they started hooking up, he introduced his girlfriend to his grandmother, who said, “Baby, that's your cousin!” Instead of taking some time to reflect, they just went right back to boning: “I ain’t about to stop! The damage has been done. I didn’t know you my whole life. I just found this out. We’ve already been thuggin’. And we are still good friends to this day.”